Jean Paul Sartre once said that hell is other people. I think that is rather astute of him, considering he was a French Existentialist and therefore didn't have occupational hazards like people in his office bringing in much yummy food for morning tea, including Mint Slice biscuits and getting pretty damn demanding that you eat the yummy food then sitting the yummy food on a desk you have to walk past many times during the work day and having to smell the yummy food. All in all, Jean Paul Sartre got it pretty easy. I guess that's why he's known as Jean Paul Sartre, French Existentialist and not Jean Paul Sartre, Fat Bastard.

I have thought of several ingenius ploys for coping with Food In The Workplace situations:

1. Become the Office Cumudegon

When someone starts offering around food, go into a meltdown about the evils of high fat/high sugar in a loud and angry voice. Abuse them for daring to offer you Mint Slices. Call them "pushers" and "enablers". Make such a fuss that you will look like a complete and utter idiot if you back down and actually eat something. The motivation to not look like a moron should override the desire to eat and soon people will stop offering you food altogether. Of course this works best if you are a casual employer and never have to see these people again after a few months.

2. Become the Office Nice Person

Instead of eating yourself, take charge and offer the food around to everyone else, even people who don't work for your company. That way the food is gone and you don't have to eat it and everyone loves you.

3. A mixture of the last two

That way, everyone will think you are insane and not offer you anything, or talk to you or go near you. That is good sometimes.

4. What I did...

Wait until the food is almost gone, then begrudgingly eat the last Mint Slice. That way you feel good for holding out but still get to eat a yummy Mint Slice (only about 300 kjs) and you aren't tempted to go back for more because there is no more.