Bad eating again today. This being sick is no good for me at all. I went to Ikea this morning (as you do when you're home sick from work) and then had meatballs and HOT CHIPS for lunch. Damn me. But I'm sick. I need comfort food. Blah. I was going to get a hot dog on the way but told myself to stop being so bloody stupid (in a British accent, no less. It seems to work better that way).

Then, on the way home, I went to the servo to get petrol and bought a chocolate bar as well. That is so bad. One of my worst habits, the one I've been working so hard to break, is the need to get myself a chocolatey treat every time I go into a shop.

And at home I've been pigging out on WW icecreams. Stocking up because I got them cheap was so much a BAD idea. Tonight I realised that it is no wonder I have been gorging myself on them. Aside from being yummo, they are the only quick and easy food I have around. And I am talking real quick and easy here - heating up a Lean Cuisine or a can of soup is too much bother.

Emotionally, I'm a wreck also. After the big Ikea effort this morning, I went downhill rapidly. By late afternoon I needed a nap. So I curled up and went to sleep but kept waking up, cold and shivery. I wanted to put the other heater on, I wanted another blanket, I wanted my hot water bottle filled but I just didn't have the strength to get out of bed. So I got all miserable and self-pitying because I live on my own and no one cares about me (or, if they do, they live so far away that they can't do anything). Mostly I don't mind living on my own (well I have housemates but they don't count, I never hardly see them) but when I'm sick I really hate it. It is so nice to have someone not just to do stuff for you but to anticipate your needs and take that whole effort of decision making away from you.

Tomorrrow I'm going to buy to some oranges and other healthy easy to prepare food. Maybe some juice. If I'm not starting to feel better by the end of tomorrow, I think I'll go see the doctor. This flu has gone on for 5 days without abating. That can't be good.