[a weight loss story]

*kathrynoh at nemesis dot com dot au*



Buggered tonight. Still. Had my first class today. Still eating chocolate.

give us a bit... :P

hope you get a good snooze tonight. will you tell us a wee bit about your class? the writer nerds will want to know :)

take care!

By Anonymous dg, at 11:42 pm  

LOL, I was thinking the same as dg above ;-) Would love to hear about the class also!

By Blogger Mary, at 5:45 am  

I meant to say this in your later post but forgot !!!
I think having some chocolate is a good idea rather than no chocolate and then spending more time thinking about it. I have also said (although I don't do it as often as I woudl like) that I will only eat decent chocolate instead of a whole slab of the normal everyday chocolate. Hope you get on top of the chocolate cravings before they get too out of hand.

By Blogger Me, at 10:13 am  




I'm stuffed. I worked until 6.45 tonight with only 10 minutes for lunch. Normally, my lunch break is not negotiable - I take half hour no matter what - but I didn't get a chance today. I missed my training run so headed into the gym and did a half hour run on the treadmill instead. Mostly I don't use the incline on the treadmill but today I put it on random and had some huge hills to run up and down. Whoa, that makes a huge difference. Afterwards I did the rower. I thought it was harder than usual so I checked the setting and it was on 9 (out of 10). Damn. No wonder I could only manage 4 minutes.

I'm also stuffed because I've been eating like a piggy all day. I took a shitload of fruit to work with me so I wouldn't be tempted by chocolate, thinking I could leave some for tomorrow. Well I ate it all. Then I ate chocolate too. Well, one of the guys was given some of the super good chocolate (Haighs, I think) and he was handing them around. How the hell do you say no to that? You don't. It was damn fine too.

I've noticed that when someone offers me something like that, I do eat it slowly and savour it whereas when I buy the same thing for myself I pig it. I think it comes from knowing that gift chocolate is rarity whereas I can always buy more for myself. Maybe I should restrict my chocolate eating to other people's.

Well it's almost time for bed.

Good to hear your leg is good for the running again, kathryn. getting to the gym after eating a bit extra during the day, will help even things out. Well done. i was babysitting the other night and got given some chocolate, and it was gone in a flash. To make up i try to eat a little lighter the next day, and to exercise well. It is hard when you are dong long hours of work to fit time in for exercise, so you did well.
I am in the low 70's, so just a couple of kilos less than you, and i too can exercise a bit harder now than i could 25 kg ago. Over the last few months i am losing at a very slow rate,albeit having the odd eat up day, but i am noticing my body is still slowly losing body fat, and clothes are fitting better. Hope you still get some good steady fat loss even with the odd eat up day.

By Anonymous barbara, at 11:00 pm  

What a great idea!! I think i'll try the chocolate prezzie thing too. The kewl thing is that I hardly ever get offered chocolate hehe I also find that if i drink a fizzy diet drink when i am having a chocolate craving, it seems to take it away :) most of the time.

By Blogger Beee, at 11:53 pm  

:) that's quite a good idea actually!

i have a rule these days where i only eat chocolate in the company of others. because i get so self conscious i eat it a helluva lot less now, hehe

By Blogger Shauna, at 8:25 am  

I like the sound of that! Who wants to pig out in front of other people, especially co-workers! I think I might go that a go!

By Blogger cdb, at 9:22 am  

I LOVE the random setting on the treadmill - it pushes me much harder than I push myself. Try covering up the display so you don't know what's coming...

By Blogger Sue, at 1:28 pm  

Don't stress about the small piece of chocolate you ate. You certainly are working it off at the gym lately.
I have always been rather lucky - have never been a big chocolate fan to begin with (although I have been known to demolish a large block of caramello choc!)


By Blogger Thinner Nancy, at 2:36 pm  

I wish I could restrict my choc eating to other people giving it to me! Mmm, chocolate. I've been craving it today because I'm a little tired so enjoyed a bag of M&M's...slowly...very slowly. 5.5 points later, damn.

By Blogger Mary, at 3:52 pm  

LMAO I find it funny because I am like you - I see other fat people and I want to give them some of my new found knowledge. I want to help them change and reform like I have. And then (if it's my free day) I eat rocky road and hot jam donuts. Yummy! LMAO

I always wonder when I look at other fattys and want to say something if they are having their free day too ?

By Blogger Jadey 0:-), at 8:15 pm  

No way can you refuse free chocolate, that is like saying no to free alcohol. The party Gods will strike you down if you do that young lady!! hehe

By Blogger Briony, at 12:20 pm  




I went to the gym today but did a light workout cos my leg is still sore. I want to go to running training tomorrow so I hope it's better by then.

Is it just me or do other people get the urge to pass on diet advice to complete strangers? I'm like a reformed smoker or a newly-converted Christian. I see someone hoeing into a jam donut at the train station and have to fight not to say anything.

Of course I never do say anything. I value my life too much. And I know how totally annoying that would be. But the urge is still there.

Hi Kathryn. u should see me when I work at Nick's Fish & Chip shop... There are so many people I feel like shaking. But what can u do?? I'm sure there are heaps of customers who look at me as if I've eaten too many f&c's also.
I hope your leg is better for your training. Have a great week.

By Blogger linda, at 9:46 pm  

I know exactly what you mean, so many times I have had to bite my tongue! sometimes things seem so obvious to me and/or so wrong and I want to tell that person, but I just hold it in. Interesting point though :-)

By Blogger Angel, at 10:54 pm  

I actually have a funny story about something like that. This older couple was arguing at a fast food restaurant about why she wasn't losing weight even though she was eating salads. I wanted to yell back that there was more fat in her dressing (I swear to god she had like a cup of the stuff) than in his burger. I didn't say anything although my husband and I started talking about it really loudly. :P

By Anonymous maddy, at 1:29 am  

Well done for displaying restraint at the gym, being injured sux eggs.

I can't believe you have a 19yo son either. Until you elluded to Andrew's age a few months ago, I thought you were 30-ish. I have known a friend for 18mths, she's 29, her partner's 30 and their kids are 12 and 10. While I don't usually even blink at the situation, it does hit me every now and then that she went through horrific labour at the same age my biggest problem was the logistics of 3 parties in one night.

By Blogger CaramelKitKat, at 1:35 am  

I know what you mean, although it's some of my friends too as well as strangers. I sometimes just feel like I've discovered an amazing secret (even though it's just eat less-exercise more) and that I really should share it. Then I realise that it's common sense, and that if they wanted to lose weight they know where I am. Still, it kills me to see what they're doing to themselves.

By Blogger YP, at 4:33 am  

Yip, isn't that funny??? haha.

By Blogger Ang, at 5:46 am  

I am exactly the same, and I try and keep my mouth shut, as hard as that is for me. My DH has 40 kg plus to lose and he just doesn't get that he needs to give up drinking beer and do some exercise. Although I have bought him an exercise bike for his birthday this week!! (*evil grin*).

By Blogger Briony, at 10:10 am  

Aww poor thing, I hope your legs get better soon, but smart @ doing light workouts ~ building up endurance without added strain.

HA! I want to do the exact same thing but I know better @ complete strangers.

I noticed how much shit people actually eat, or if at Uni there is a BBQ or something I'm probably the only one watching how much oil and ick is being put in the food.

I'd never say anything though because yea I like my life too. I'm even reluctant to talk about eating habits when people ask cause I know I can fall into a mini lecture on nutrition.

And honestly who'd take a fat girl seriously about weight loss. So I'd just be wasting my breath.

Happy Belated Birthday to Andrew too!

By Blogger Dee, at 11:18 am  

LOL I do feel like it at times but of course I wouldn't. If someone starts hassling me about what I'm eating, I let it rip. I don't like people telling me what I should and shouldn't be doing unless I ask for advice and put myself out there for it.

By Blogger Mary, at 4:21 pm  

Oh but on the other hand, my mother and Dan do get some lectures sometimes :-/

By Blogger Mary, at 4:22 pm  



19 Years

Can you remember what you were doing 19 years ago? I can. I was in the labour ward of the Queen Alexandra Hospital in Hobart. Today my baby is 19 years old. Still a baby though.

I thought it was bad enough when he turned 18 but now I'm freaking - he's only a teenager for one more year. I'm far too young to have an adult son. Although I guess he is an adult - he's been living out of home for nearly year and more than capable of looking after himself.

We went for our weekly outing to the market this morning then off to Northland to get his present. He wanted an Adelaide Crows footy jumper. Yeah, embarassing I know. They didn't have one that fitted so he's going to get one in the city. But I did get him a birthday treat. I took him to KFC for lunch. I used to love the Mashies they have at KFC and, ever since they bought them back, I've wanted some. They aren't nearly as good as I remember. I was tempted to stick a candle in one though and sing happy birthday but I didn't.

Oh, I got a kind of compliment from my son today and, if you knew him, you'd realise how rare that is. We are talking about a boy who didn't notice I lost 30 kgs. He told me that his friends think I'm the coolest mother ever. I say "kinda compliment" because when I was a teenager people said that about my mum and I hated it. I think the difference is that I go out and be cool with my own friends while my mum used to try to hang around my friends being cool. Grrr!

I was going to go for a run this morning but I've hurt my leg. I think something's gone funny in my hip. I don't think I did it running but doing squats at the gym yesterday. My PT wanted me to use the Smith's machine (I think that's what it's called) but it feels weird and awkward to me and I'm not sure if my form is right. I think from now on I'll just just a barbell instead.

I don't really like the program my PT worked out for me anyway so I made up my own with a bit of help from various web sites. Doing different body parts on different days bugs me. I'd rather have a program that I can do several times a week.

This is what I'm doing:
  • Squats
  • Lunges
  • Lat Pulldown
  • Dumbell Row
  • Pushups
  • Crunches - or those awful ones with your legs in the air that work the lower abs too.
I'm not sure if I'm missing anything. If you think I'm leaving out a major muscle group, let me know.

I think I'll have a lazy afternoon. I've just finished stewing up a big bag of plums and nectarines I got at the market and I've been listening to my new Beth Orton CD. There is a huge storm here and it sounds like the thunder is directly overhead. I love storms. When I was little, my mum didn't want us to be scared of storms so she'd gather my sister and I around the window or on the verandah and point out everything that was beautiful about them.

Happy bday to your son.

Good idea, have a rest up and hopefully the leg will be better soon!


By Blogger Ang, at 5:06 pm  

LOL I can relate to not thinking you are old enough to have a son that age. When I tell people my oldest is 20 this year I am always disappointed if they don't express amazement that I could have a son that age. Problem is no one ever does!!!
Happy Birthday to him - I think it's great that he does the market trip with you - sounds like he thinks you are pretty cool too!

By Blogger Lesley, at 6:29 pm  

Love the storm story - I suspect your Mum really was cool - apart from the hanging out with your friends bit!
My boy has just started his last year at school and I have to keep reminding myself to enjoy him as he is now, instead of freaking out about how fast his childhod has gone.

By Blogger Sue, at 5:51 am  

What a great memory of your mum and storms. Wow, that's so powerful. I am going to make an effort to do that with my son, thank you for sharing that with us!
Hope your leg feels better soon, and I hope you're having a great weekend.

By Blogger Briony, at 9:29 am  

whoa- for some reason i thought you had a primary school age child! happy bday to the son :)

By Blogger Kt, at 2:10 pm  

My daughter is 4 this year and i am hating it as she starts school in a year :( they grow up soooo fast!!!!
Sounds like you had a great day with your son:) and hey anything nice a teenager say's has to be written down for futur referrence lol and i'm still like that now with my hubby lol

By Blogger Antigone, at 7:12 pm  

Happy Birthday to you son! Mmm KFC, don't tempt me. Love the compliment from your son, that's cool and how about your own mum and those storms!? What beautiful way to appreciate nature. My mum would shut all the door, windows, blinds and make us sit in a dark room until the storm passed. Weirdo.

By Blogger Mary, at 4:19 pm  



I got on the scales this morning and they were down to 76.2 kg. How weird is that, especially since I've been in the 77s all last week. I don't understand; scales just are too wack sometimes. But I'm not taking it as official until next Friday's weigh in.

And yes, it's 6.30 am and I'm up and blogging. I don't understand that either. I've decided to add another rule to the three below. I'm restricting myself to one coffee or one cola drink a day this week. I know my caffeine intake has gone up with week because we have a coffee machine in the new office so I'm hoping less caffeine = more sleep for me. I've been a zombie lately.

About the meetup - I'd urge anyone who is hestitant about it to come along. Being a veteran of blogging (I had personal blog for years before I started this one) not to mention internet dating etc, I've had loads of experience meeting up with people I only know from online and I've never regretted it (well okay, maybe some of the dates....). Sure, not everyone you meet is going to be your bosum buddy but it's fun and at least you aren't sitting around wondering what would have happened if you had gone.

Hey I wouldn't think twice about meeting up, if I was anywhere near Australia! You seem like a friendly and interesting person to talk to..... and I'm sure the meet up will go well.

Take care

By Blogger Ang, at 7:06 am  

Yeah I'm up too Kathryn. But I'm meeting Michelle at 8am for our long run!!

I'd love to come and meet up and will pencil it in the diary. Just need to check that hubby will be home for babysitting duty!!

Congratulations on another loss, you're doing great.

By Blogger Jaykay, at 7:28 am  

I agree - we should take every chance we can to meet up with the peopls from Blogland - at least they're not COMPLETE strangers.

By Blogger Sue, at 9:02 am  

Great take on meeting bloggers and stop looking at the scales! I totally understand the zombie thing and caffeine needs. What a vicious cycle to get into. I am slowly kicking it, again.

By Blogger Mary, at 10:01 am  

if i had known you were up so early you could have come and done a lap of the Tan with me.. i was there at 7am! look forward to your weigh in next week.

By Blogger linda, at 11:55 am  

Bloody scales LOL.

By Blogger M, at 9:53 am  



Weigh In - 77 kgs

Well I had a gain this week. Not unexpected but I have to confess something. After last Friday's weigh in (at 76.4 kg), I got on the scales Saturday morning and they were back up to the 77s. I think half my problems this week are in my thinking - well I'm going to have a gain no matter what. That is just plain stupid.

Several times, I've talked about my rule of three. When things get tough and it's too hard to fix everything at once, I give myself three things rules. I figure three is an easy number. I can change three little things about my life.

So here they are:

  1. Keep up the exercise as much as possible - not going to be easy with work and school this week but I'll do the best I can.
  2. Stop eating lollies and chocolates. Even if I have to take a whole sack of fruit to work with me. I've got to curb these bad habits before they get too strong.
  3. Make sleep a priority.

That's it for the next week. I'm not going to track. I'm not even going to worry if I gain again (well not too much).

Bugger about the gain. Your list is good and will go a long way to reverse the trend. I especially like #3 and will endeavour to get as much in as possible this weekend.

Hope you have a good one :)

By Blogger M, at 8:19 pm  

Good to see you are being more positive about things...and moving on fromn the gain to a wicked plan of action.

I'm too nervous to go on those training runs because I know damn well that I would come LAST!

By Blogger Lucinda, at 8:29 pm  

Such a minor gain in the grand scheme of your amazing loss to date! I really like your rule of three so stick by them and be good to yourself this week :-)

By Blogger Mary, at 9:59 am  



Melbourne Bloggers Meetup

Woohoo! March 30th in the CBD. If you are interested email (which would be Lucinda) by the 10th.

how scary...i'm such a intimidated to meet all these wonderful ppl i have been talking to...blah...whats the go for it???

By Blogger laura, at 1:53 pm  

Yaaaaaaay. You guys are going to have a great time. It will be a little nervous but take it from someone who has been there - you will be surprised at how quickly you are comfortable with the people who have supported you, commisserated with you, celebrated your victories and empathised with you when things weren't so great.

Do it, do it, do it :D

By Blogger M, at 8:07 pm  

Can I come, can I come? :-) I might just be in Melbourne around that time. Will let you know. You guys are going to have a blast!

By Blogger Mary, at 9:57 am  



It's weird how life works sometimes. After posting last night, I received an email from an old friend, an invitation to his 40th birthday. Well more like a pre-invitation since the party is in June and there are no details yet.

This whole thing is weird in so many ways. We used to be best friends. Were for 15 years or more but haven't spoken for the past 5 years or so. I guess there is a long version and a short one to this story and I'll try to stick to the short one at the moment. Our friendship just sort of faded out - no big fights, no words said, nothing. It just ended. Bad feelings on both sides but nothing said. Instead we hurt each other and did stupid things instead of talking about the issues. There is a lot of water under that bridge. For me, fighting is always better. At least things get out in the open and you deal with them.

At the same time, we were both changing the people we are. Changing in different ways.

Sometimes I miss him. Of course. You can't be friends with someone for that long and not miss them. Other times, I get this intense burst of fury out of nowhere. I want to hunt him down and punch him. Mostly I'm angry because when he changed, he took my friend away - the friend that he used to be.

So anyway, this party is going to be a situation where I'll be around people I haven't seen for many years. People who knew me as a different person. I feel like I've been at least 2 or 3 different people since then.

It's not just a case of them having known me when I was fat (although my sister reminded me that I had to go just to show them) but back then I was, we all were big into club, into partying hard. I got out of that whole scene. It was fun for a while but I was over it all. I just stopped wanting to be that person.

One of the real eye openers from all this is that it's made me see that the weight loss isn't the first or only transformation in my life. I've "reinvented myself", as they say in the celebrity mags, several times over. I've left behind the things that don't work for me and found the things that do. I can do this.

How boring it would be if we were the same 'me' all our lives. Although I believe our essential personality never changes, we are different people at different stages. Our true friends not only accept that - they enjoy it.

By Blogger Sue, at 9:28 am  

I agree with Sue 100% - I think we are different people depending on where we are in our lives and what is happening around us.
I have been finding that there are a lot of people who treat me differently now that I have lost my weight - and that is OK - they need to deal with their issues, I am happy where I am.
I hope that you are able to work out things out so that you can have your friend back - maybe over the past 5 years you have both changed in ways that are now appealing to each other.
I say go to the party and show them what a fantastic job you have done with your weight loss - be proud of who you are now and let them deal with any issues that might come up.
Have a great weekend and a great Melbourne bloggers meet !!!!!

By Blogger Me, at 12:41 pm  

You'll be fine, wear something gorgeous and knock all their socks off!!

By Blogger Briony, at 1:43 pm  

I had never really thought about the different 'me' a person can be, but it is so true, it all depends on the situation, and circumstances. Imagion how great the reveal of the new you will be!!

By Blogger Ang, at 3:32 pm  

You CAN do it. You WILL do it.

I have changed many times over and I am extremely glad my family, my friends and esp my husband have changed right along side of me. I think it was called growing up..

By Blogger M, at 8:02 pm  

People who re-invent themselves are those that live life! Imagine being the same person, doing the same thing, wearing the same clothes *urgh*, boring. You are a truly remarkable woman.

By Blogger Mary, at 9:56 am  



I Need Sleep

I've been a tired, miserable, cranky bitch lately and a tired, miserable, cranky me is an eating me. I got tempted by the nougat again today. It's my nemesis, I tells ya.

A whole bunch of prickly little irritations landed in my lap today - nothing earth shattering, but enough to have me grouchy. I thought I'd get some Dole money today cos my working has been so irregular but nope. Zilch. Which left me just enough to pay the rent with NOTHING left over. I grabbed a lasagne out of the fridge for lunch and spend my $2 coin that I keep for the gym lockers on train fare, then I thought bugger it and spend $20 of my rent money on cigarettes and fruit (it was a small lasagne and I was starving).

Also, I've been waiting for people to get back to me about references with little luck. There is one guy I want to use since he's with the same company that I'm applying for the new job with, but I haven't seen him for 18 months so for all I know he's moved on.

And I found out my course started this week not next so I missed classes.

Tomorrow has got to be better. Well it's pay day for starters *grin*.


I've been thinking deeply about stuff lately. Like my running. It's so exciting for me to run because I've never run before. Maybe when I was a young kid, but even in high school, if we had PE and had to run laps, the teacher would look me up and down then say "you can walk it". I wasn't even encouraged to try. I think PE teachers should have to learn the correct way to deal with the fat kid - mostly they either go for ridicule (cos that is so successful in changing people's behaviour) or ignoring them completely. Of course, I never had any desire to run but maybe, if I was encouraged and told I could do it, I might have.

I've also been thinking about being close to my goal. It's scary and it's a place I never thought I'd be. There is a difference between growing up fat and putting on weight when you get older. Not that it makes things easier or harder, just that you don't have any concept of yourself as anything but fat. Fat is what you are.

If you are born with curly hair, you can straighten it with a hair straightener or an iron for a time but you you don't have straight hair: you have curly hair that is straightened.

That's what being fat has been like to me all my life. I could start a diet, I could exercise, but I always thought I'd be a fat person. It has been part of me, sometimes all of me. The fat girl. The one who doesn't run unless there is a shoe sale, the one who has a healthy appetite, the one who drinks her own weight in margaritas (and that's a lot of margaritas, trust me). The one who jokes and laughs and is the life of the party... for a while.

There are things you can't be when you are fat - like wistful or ethereal or dainty. You put those things aside and take up the ones you can be. Smart and mouthy and funny, they go with fat.

Who am I? I think that's a question a few people have been asking lately. Not about me, obviously but about themselves. I don't know who I am. I have no idea who I can be or what I'm capable of.

Sometimes I feel like I've forced myself into a mold - fat and unlovable. I have my work cut out for me there, I think.

Lately, I've been reading Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office. It's really opened my eyes to a lot of things that have happened in my work life, things that have spilt into my personal life and shaped my whole concept of myself. I'm realising that people have made me believe I'm crap because they get something out of that, not because I really am crap.

I have always had this naive belief about work - if I turned up and did well, people would notice and I'd be rewarded for that. When that didn't happen, I shut myself off. I'd not be present - physically or otherwise - and that would esculate the situation. I've done a lot of foolish things - say if an error was made and I was partly to blame. I'd take the blame, figuring the other people involved would take responsiblity for their share. Ha. Never happens.

Sadly, the corporate world isn't about being nice, or being adult. I don't want to learn to play stupid political games but I do need to stand up for myself. I need to value myself and value the work I do and I need to communicate that to others.

Damn it, I'm good at what I do. But no one knows if I don't say. And if I don't take credit for my own achievements then someone else will.

So, the other thing I've been thinking about is sacrifices. I've been getting down because I have no money, but tonight I realised that no one has everything. No matter who you are.

It isn't about having a life where everything is perfect and right. It's about deciding on what's important to you and then ensuring you have that. If you have kids, you give up a lot. You give up a lot if you don't too. There is no right or wrong. You can have money or you can have time, unless you are really lucky. My sister has money and a great job, but she works hours that I never could and would never want to. My other sister has no money and is reliant on my mum, but she has the time to do the things she wants. I'm floundering between the two. I'm floundering on many fronts.

I'm going to start by not regretting the things I don't have but making sure the sacrifices I make in this life are decided by me and not thrust apon me. I think the starting place is to have a clear idea of my values - everything else springs from that.

They say that if you offered people a million dollars to permanently put on 20 kg most people would say no thanks. So maybe you were happy to work a few less weeks over summer, cos that has given you a little extra time to exercise and get to the mid 70's weight wise.
But apparently the average woman has wages that are only about 70 percent of the average guys, and also it is hard to afford child care or even find good child care, and we all know that teenagers need our time as well, so it must have been hard to get ahead financially while being on your own bringing up a son over the last few years. Now you are fee to move ahead but it can be hard to negotiate a good deal for yourself when you have to focus on getting some work just to pay for basic necessities.
There are a lot of things you want to achieve in life, and i hope you put on that cute new work skirt or your workout gear, and do it in style. i also hope some wonderful things come your way, and i do not just mean nougat.
Some people reward themselves with a small treat at the end of the day, provided they have done their workouts. You have been very strict on yourself, and so hope you find a happy medium for you.

By Anonymous barbara, at 12:05 am  

A pretty full-on post there...and a very interesting read. Yours generally are. Your posts are both catchy and punchy with a natural, conversation-like flow - any chance you could roll a lot of this stuff into a book and be happy with it? Really just a matter of editing.

The main thing in my life that's mine to control is uni, and if that's going badly, so does everything else. But by the same token, success in that area is the perfect all-round pick-me-up. I work part-time so that I have time for uni, then a week passes in the blink of an eye and I have done nothing to contribute to my own academic future - WTF??!

Could you take the approach that you don't care about work, and focus your energies on things you find fulfilling? Do you ever pick an ideal state of being and then work backwards, step by step, until you get to where you are today? I find that a good way of making seemingly large obstacles, if only I could do the same with weight loss!!

I look forward to your next read.

By Blogger CaramelKitKat, at 12:09 am  

Thank you for another interesting read - you always raise such relevant points.
I think that, while the issues are yours, there are many of us who can relate them to circumstances in our own lives - for me it is always good to know that I am not the only one who has battled with something, that I am normal because there are other people who have the same sorts of problems to deal with.
Hope you can get some sleep soon - I know what lack of sleep does to a person.
Take care and look after yourself !

By Blogger Me, at 2:27 am  

You truly do have a gift for putting your thoughts into words! And such great analogies (the "straightened" curly hair, etc.).

You know, it's hard to figure out who you are, and that's mostly because we are always changing, I think. I'm not sure anybody can definitely say what they would do in every conceivable circumstance.

For me, I have noticed personality changes with my weight. I was a normal weight in high school, and was well-liked but I didn't take any crap from anyone. When I became overweight and then obese, I noticed that I would put up with a lot more crap just so people would like me. Sometimes that really sucked, but it also added character and depth to my previously superficial personality. I was forced to become a lot more patient and introspective.

Now that I'm back to a "normal" weight, well...I don't know. I'm somewhere in-between. I feel I've grown as a person, and I don't know if it's because I'm older now or because I was obese for ten years. Probably a little of both. But I'm really trying to hold on to the lessons I've learned and the "good" scars they've left on me. And I'm slowly getting my ass-kicking skills back.

Kathryn, you have a great personality to begin with! So you can decide which parts don't work for you and which ones you want to supplement. And as your confidence grows, I think it will be easier to stand up for yourself at work. I know it's hard to re-invent yourself in a place where people are used to seeing you behave a certain way. But you *can* do it, and I know you will! :)

By Blogger Zara, at 4:46 am  

i so indentify with parts of this post, for most of my life, i've been overweight
(however, i'd love to be that kind of overweight now, coz it was 10kg, not 30kg!). The only time in my life i can remember being slim i was borderline eating disorder. I ate carrots & apples most of the tm, pretended i wasnt feeling well if faced with certain foods - i.e, fish n chips if staying at a friends house, pretend not to like certain foods even if i loved them (i.e. crumbed schnitzel was a fave but all of a sudden, didnt like it). So the only memories i have of being thinner are unhealthy & hungry.
I remember PE class, because i was only slightly overweight, i was encouraged but i remember one toime in PE class at highschool, a friend & I (me overweight, her rather obese) were told we could do our own thing while the rest of our class played ultimate frisbee. its like gee, discount the fat girls straight away.
good luck on the work front & i'm glad you have realised that you are great at what you do & that you should stand up for yourself.
thank god for pay day too huh!

By Blogger Kt, at 10:55 am  

"people have made me believe I'm crap because they get something out of that, not because I really am crap" I still don't get why people do this. Small minded people with nothing better to do in their life than make themselves feel more important, more superior, more everything by knocking someone else down. Well these are the people who may think they have everything, but like you so succinctly said "no one has everything" I bet they have problems they are not even prepared to face and as much as you probably got the crap because you were large, you're losing the weight baby and they are always going to be pricks!

*taking deep breath*

I love the way your posts get me fired up. Hope the pay comes through quickly and more work comes your way xx

By Blogger M, at 11:28 am  

thank god that theres always a tomorrow hey...and i'm you about the PE teachers...alothough I wasn't big, I was quiet and shy and never put my hand up...therefore forgeotten or pushed as someone who just didn't like sports, but its was so not true...oh well...bring on tomorrow...will be in touch

By Blogger laura, at 12:37 pm  

Ok I've had to read and re-read this post to wrap my own thoughts around it. Such a deep issue.

I have this secret fear that I'll always be the former fat girl. I think it has a lot to do with what you've said about always defining yourself as that. What's messed up is I've been normal weight longer then I have been morbidly obese. I think it's more the fact that I was *treated* like the fat person (in my family, friends..) that I identify so strongly with it. Regardless of if I was actually fat.

It's so hard and scary (like you said) to peel away the only person you know. The only person other people can relate to you. I sent my mum a photo of me recently and I'm still 25kg out of my healthy weight range... the only thing she said was "don't get too thin". I mean when I'm still classified as severely overweight and she's worried I'm getting to thin, it really showed me that I am the fat girl.

I'm a little curious as to how people that knew me at my highest will be able to relate to me now... how comfortable they'll be at me not being who they thought I was.

I know a few of them will act as if being in the right range for my weight is a rouse, that I'm just a fat girl playing as a thin one for now. Holding their breathes for all of it to come back on.
I agree with you completely about letting go of regrets for things you don't have, and finding the strength to both appreciate and realise what you do have.

I agree with knowing who you are and knowing what you want to have in life will help guide you into achieving it. We should all have the courage to define ourselves rather then letting society and others do that for us.

such a wonderful post. Made me think ALOT.

By Blogger Dee, at 1:20 pm  

Even talking about PE classes makes my skin go cold and my stomach churn. We used to have the "smart" way of choosing teams of each captain picking one person at a time and I was (yes you guessed it) ALWAYS last picked. Most of the time they didn't even say my name, they just walked away and expected me to follow. I hated it. I also think that's my reason for not going to the gym, i'm too scared.
Enough of my complaining, sorry!

By Blogger Briony, at 1:46 pm  

Thanks for that insightful post! There's a lot of food for thought in it, and it got me thinking about who I am and what I want in my life too... I believe it is a good thing when you are thinking about such things. You can obtain clarity about what is important to you and set your priorities accordingly.

By Blogger alea, at 10:17 pm  

Bloody stupid money and working to earn a living. Some days it is tough. I only had enough money for rent and my weekly travel pass this week so I was really grumpy too on Thursday but we always work a way around it hey.

I am so proud of your running success and beating any childhood demons. School teachers have a lot to answer for but then school kids themselves can be so cruel.

Mmm..thinking about being wistful, ethereal or dainty. I don't think I will ever be any of these no matter how much weight I lose LOL. I will never be dainty that's for sure because I am tall and have a swimmers build (I always get asked if I'm a swimmer).

But who is Kathryn? From all the comments I recieved last week on my indentity post, I can only say that the core of you is there and that you are only now really discovering yourself. For once you are really looking at yourself and maybe are a little overwhelmed?

I know this past year has led to so many changes, that like Kate said, it can make you feel a little topsy turvy but you know what, this is not necessarily a bad thing. And hon, you are certainly NOT unlovable. I really dig you and think you have heaps to offer as a friend, a lover and as a writer. You need to find the fire in your again and simply do the best you can for yourself and those closest to you.

Focus on your course and earning enough to survive and remember you DON'T want to be a corporate slave and then have no time for your creative pursuits.

An interesting resource I've been looking at recently is Freelance Success. This chick has a great "suggested reding" list for those that don't fit in to the norm of society (like me). Check it out for inspiration -

My partner is also blogging about heaps of really good stuff about writing on his blog. It might help?

By Blogger Mary, at 9:51 am  



I Love Lychees

I only got into lychees last summer - boy, was I missing out! I love them. I love the fiddly peeling and I love the juicy centre. I love rolling them around on my tongue and biting into the membranes. I love the sweet, almondy taste and sucking on the smooth pip. They are February's Fruit of Choice.

Today was up and down. Up was walking home from work. I've moved offices so it's only 10 km now not 12. Damn it. I need that extra 2 km (only joking). It was weird - I came over all funny on my walk. Like I had a big lump in my chest restricting my airways and couldn't get enough oxygen. I figured it was either a panic attack or a heart attack and either way there wasn't much to do except keep on walking. I'd got to a bit of the track that detours from the main path - it's extremely narrow and there are no handrails - just a steep drop to the river. Since I'm a little bit scared of heights, that might have been making me panic.

Last time I walked it, there was a dude riding his bike along it (despite the no bikes sign) and I had to go right near the side when he passed. I am so sick of cyclists. They whinge all the time about how discourteous drivers are but they are damn shocking. Since I've lived in Northcote, I've seen 3 people (one an old lady) knocked down by cyclists on the footpaths. There is a bike track on the road, for god sake. Use the damn thing. I had somone abuse me for not getting over to let them pass on the bridge near my house (yeah, I didn't hear their bell because of my music but again, there is a bike path). When I'm walking along the paths near my house, they act like they own them.... it's a walking path too people!

Well... got that out of my system... the other bad thing today - my new office has a place of evil. Just near the kitchens is a bookcase and on top of it is a cornucopia of fund raising lollies. Boxes of the buggers in all shapes and sizes. Normally, I act like these things don't exist at all but, at this office, I've started thinking - if I were going to buy one, which one would I buy? And that kind of thinking leads to acting.

Yeah, I thought I could buy a bag of peanut nougat today and stop after a sensible portion. Well I did end up throwing some away. But I ate 3/4 and threw away 1/4 instead of the other way around. I had to throw it away cos no way could I stop eating it otherwise. Nougat, I love you.

I think I'm addicted to sugar. Seriously. If I go cold turkey, I'm fine but once I start with it, I can't stop.


I had a first interview for a job this morning. I don't want to say too much - it jinxes it, don't you know. But I want it. It's somewhere I used to work and I loved the location. The work sounds easy and well paid. And it's for 6 - 12 months. The agency people seemed very keen. Fingers and toes crossed for this one.


Tomorrow I have to come straight home from work. My landlord is coming around to collect the rent. They do this in person and with cash - because they are as dodgy as hell - and they said I could leave my rent (we all pay separately) with one of my housemates. But since they are all dodgy and totally flake too, I am not leaving money without getting a receipt. So, that means no gym after work. I'm thinking of going before work. Scary, huh. Okay, maybe not for you... but I'm the worst morning person ever. Showering, eating and getting dressed is the most I can manage. If I don't manage, I can always go for a run after paying the rent. Or run off with the rent money and buy shoes - woohoo!


After my last post, I have to mention this (I was actually reminded by Argy's post). As I was walking home tonight, I was crossing a bridge and a woman and man were coming the other way. She was trying to balance her handbag and carry an uncovered chocolate cake. In the cake hand, she had her cigarette. Now, I love smoking as much (okay, much more) than the next person but carrying an uncovered cake across a windy bridge with a lit cigarette? Even I baulked at that. Must have been a delish cake with that unique ashy flavour.

WOw the amount you walk is amazing - I wish I had the motiavation to walk that far each day on top of all the exercise you do at the gym (when you don't have to get home to pay the rent of course !!!!)

Will be crossing fingers, toes and legs (well at least until Thursday !!) for you - hope the interview goes well and that you are successful with it.

I totally hear where you are coming from with the sugar thing - I am trying not to start at all because I am the same - once I start I just can't stop !!!!

Have a great week - good luck and look after yourself !

By Blogger Me, at 11:00 pm  

how could someone show such disrespect for a CHOCOLATE CAKE?!?!!!

will keep toes and fingers crossed for your job kathryn! and eyes too! X-)

By Anonymous dg, at 11:01 pm  

Damn DG keeps beating me to post first! I'll get you one of these days, pesky DG.

Anyway- loved this post! Lots of things I totally relate too- spesh the sugar thing. Had a bit of a battle with a tin of syrup and nothing but a spoon the other day.

Well done on throwing away the rest.

By Blogger Lainey, at 12:42 am  

I have never heard of lychees before. Is this an Australian fruit or am I just dense? I was watching a British show the other month and they started talking about leeks which was another vegetable I'd never heard of. I have to widen my food horizons.

By Blogger PastaQueen, at 3:58 am  

I am with you on the sugar - I am beter off cold turkey!!
Fingers crossed about getting the job you want:)

I didn't realise you lived in Northcote - I used to live off high st a long time ago:)

By Blogger Leighanne, at 9:20 am  

I think I'm courteous when I'm riding, but will try to be a bit more aware - many of our paths are for pedestrians and bikes.]
I'm like you with the sugar - okay if I keep right away, but once I start, oh boy!
From a morning gym person - I like the mornings so much more than the evenings. More energy. I think, and no waiting for people to get off the machine I want to use (and then having to wipe it down because they're pigs). Good idea to get a few carbs in you though - perhaps a banana or an apple - so you don't crash.
Cake and smoking - two things I like, albeit infrequently - should definitely be kept well apart!

By Blogger Sue, at 10:38 am  

Poo. Have smoke. Enjoy it. Don't juggle god's gift with cake. Wrong. In all sorts of ways.

By Blogger Beckie, at 10:57 am  

And, yes, fartlek is one of my FAVOURITE exercise workds.

By Blogger Sue, at 12:43 pm  

Oh, I haven't had a great lychee since I've been in Australia! I get them here in Canada but they just aren't the same. To me it was like eating a little piece of heaven. Do you find that they almost taste a little of what you would imagine roses to taste like...just a hint? yummmmmmm When I first saw it I thought they were the most bizarre little things I've ever seen, but who knew that that's what laid under that barky looking exterior.

By Blogger Blissful Loser, at 1:24 pm  

Fingers and toes are crossed!!

By Blogger Ang, at 4:36 pm  

Hope you get the job. I am disgusted that someone would hold an uncovered chocolate cake and a cigarette at the same time, especially WITHOUT a glass of champagne to top it right off! LOL.

By Blogger Briony, at 1:30 pm  

I like your Lychee description, yum! Christ and I'd be having a panic attack too if there was a chance I'd drop into the river LOL and as for cyclists, grrr. I live in an area where a good majority are cyclists, even my partner, but sometimes I reckon they need to be made to get a licence too and learn the rules!

Fingers crossed for the job!!

By Blogger Mary, at 10:56 am  




I've been planning to the training runs for the Run For the Kids since they started last week and was all prepped to go tonight. Thought I'd miss out because my boss came over with a bunch of scanning for me to do at 5.00 (note: don't ever do that to a temp) but I put it through the scanner, got changed, chucked it on her desk and ran for the train.

I made it in time and got all registered up then realised EVERYONE looked like they could run much faster than me. I wanted to just fade in the background. Then they started the warm ups and I was right up the front and felt like a goon.

We started running and I did okay, although we had to go down Swanston St and I realised I might see someone I know. How embarassing would that be. Got to the Yarra and I needed to go to the toilet so I had to stop running for a while. So I alternated jogging and running until I got around to the loos. I thought I was dead last by that stage but the group leader said there were a few behind me.

After my toilet break, I was sure I was way behind. I ran a bit, walked a bit and ran some more. I had just started walking again and the group leader caught me with me and made me run up a hill. After that, I ran all the back to into the city. I even overtook one of the girls who was ahead of me. Not that it matters but I like to not come last - that's winning in my book (I'm sure there is a Homer Simpson quote that's applicable here).

It was great running with a group and having the leader giving advice. It was also great, albeit a shock to the system, to run outside instead of on the treadmill. Outside is much harder.

I have a new running goal now - when I run by the Yarra, I want to be fast enough to steal one of those yummy smelling sausages off someone's bbq and get away with it.

Afterwards, we went back to the N1ke store and got free water and fruit and had a cool down. The running people are mighty friendly and I have to go back now cos I have a frequent runner's card. I only need 7 more stamps and I get a runner's kit. I am a total sucker for that stuff.

So then I went to the gym and did Body Balance. That was a great cooldown and stretch plus it got my abs exercise over with.

Now don't go thinking that I'm like all good or highly motivated for going to the gym after running. I can see how you might think that but this was my rationale - I could have gone outside and caught a tram straight home but that would have meant lighting up a cigarette in full view of the running people while wating at the tram stop. So I thought I'd walk a couple of blocks to the gym and have one on the way. Of course, the showers and change room at the gym were looking awfully tempting by then too.

I can't wait for my next session. If you have been thinking about going along and haven't ... eg. Lucinda... then I'd highly recommend it. I'm so enthused at the moment, it's a great feeling.

Got home and the power was off so I had to light candles. Luckily it's back on now or I'd have no internet and be going crazy.


A few people have apologised lately for leaving long comments. Don't. I love long comments. Write me an essay if you like.


I have two possibilities for interesting longer term work come up today. Fingers crossed. Oh, and on the topic of work, I usually don't take lunch cos I hate doing that (and I'm lazy) but since I'm so poor atm I've found the ideal cheap and easy lunch. A banana roll - just duck into the supermarket and get a roll and a banana - voila! It doesn't help though when you get home so late that dinner is one of those biscuit and cheese packs on the train. I need my vegies!

wow! Sounds like you had an awesome run! I think its a great idea to have running groups like that. I wonder if they have something like that here.. i'm going to look into it as soon as i'm over my jet lag (which is absolutely horrible I might add).
You should definately add some peanut butter to your banana roll.. *drool* great for giving you energy for the run too!
Sounds gross but trust me its really good.

By Blogger Beee, at 11:51 pm  

go you good thing! i could just picture where you were running and that's quite a way! your sausage-stealing goal is a goodun too. hehe.

and i'll second that PB & banana combo. it's noice.

By Anonymous dg, at 1:35 am  

Sounds like you had a good work out tonight - well done !
I often think I would like to run but I know that when push comes to shove I will look like a dork and so then land up just walking - good for you for giving it a go and especially for overtaking the girl so you didn't come last.
Hope things work out on the job front.
Take care and have a great week !

By Blogger Me, at 2:36 am  

I have this hilarious image of you now...stealing a sausage during your run and then hiding away somewhere and eating it while smoking a cigarette after your run. LOL! Love it!

Who knew that a cigarette would have the healthy benefit of getting you to the gym? Be careful what you admit here in writing or the tobacco companies will be ringing you and asking you to be their new mascot. Big brother is everywhere you know, hehe.

Congrats on that run!!

By Blogger Zara, at 4:24 am  

well done on all the running - you've come such a long way. banana on crumpets is my fave.. yummo

By Blogger linda, at 9:10 am  

OMG you've totally romanticised running for me again <3 THANK YOU! That sounded like such a great run and well done, taking over someone and everything!!

I've heard that running outside is completely different to the treadmill and that it's also I don't know "more freeing", if that's the right wording.

I'm so pumped to exercise again tho.

I'm crossing my fingers and toes that the good job opportunities come good for you.

By Blogger Dee, at 10:05 am  

Sounds like your run was just what you needed and the group leader sounds very motivating indeed. That is always a positive!! Well done. XX

By Blogger Jodie, at 10:28 am  

Goooooo you.

I was getting little hits of adrenaline while reading about your running. that is the weirdest thing ever! (My adrenaline - not your running).

I cant express how proud I am of you.

By Blogger Beckie, at 11:47 am  

I was reaaly self-conscious about runnig in a group, but there's almost always someone slower than me - although that seems impossible to me. Running outside is definitely harder than on the treadmill, but so much more interesting, especially if you're as nosy as I am - love perving at people's gardens and in their kitchen windows...

By Blogger Sue, at 12:35 pm  

Okay someone had to find the Homer Simpson applicable quote and this was the best I could come up with in the short amount of time I had to comment:
Homer to Bart: "Son, when you participate in sporting events, its not whether you win or loose, its how drunk you get".
Great going on your run, you'll be the leader of the pack in no time!
I know what you mean about vegetables, I really miss them if I have a vegie free day.
Have a good one!

By Blogger Briony, at 1:24 pm  

LOL at your sausage goal...stop, thief! :-) What an amazing effort. You are continually suprising me and inspiring me to really push myself too, no matter the reason. Banana on a roll? Freak LOL but you know what, I'll probably try it now. Have a great week.

PS. I hear you about the boredom factor kicking in with drunk friends. We don't go to many parties anymore for this factor and I find that a bit sad but I just get bored too quickly and want to go home.

By Blogger Mary, at 2:55 pm  

Sounds great Kath - very motivating and positive. And LOL at the sausage goal! heh heh

Keep up the great work darl xx

By Blogger Philippa, at 3:16 pm  

Hey good on you! The next few are bound to be easier as you will know what to expect.

mmmmm banana + bread. can't go wrong!

Thats one way to sneak your 5+ a day in.

By Blogger Ang, at 4:56 pm  

maybe you "carbed up" at the market on the weekend, in subconsciously realizing you were in for the big run soon. apparently a lot of athletes do that, cos best not to eat too much day of run so sometimes they eat some extra in the couple of days before hand.
you must be getting superfit, Kathryn, to see the body pump at the gym as a nice cool down after your exercise.
As far as dollars are concerned i am sending you lots of good thoughts that you can get some nice rewards, afford your exercise and find some nice things. Your ability to run even got you to the tram and run on time. And you got to meet some cool people. So glad your hard work is starting to come together for you.

By Anonymous barbara, at 6:09 pm  

It is so cool you are doing this - and I read that Philippa might be thinking about it too. Coincidince that she met up with Lucinda before the post - I think not!! LOL

When I read about you nicking the sausage I pictured the KFC ad where the guy nicks the potato things and now I am all hungry. Time to put on the steak and veg.

Have a great night and well done again on your running :D

By Blogger M, at 6:55 pm  

wow, you are getting some awesome exercise there!!
good luck with the job prospects!

By Blogger Kt, at 7:17 pm  

That is one hell of a yarn. Really love the idea of running with sausage in hand, ciggie in other. You could be the poster girl for ANTI-PC!! Have a great day.

By Blogger Jules, at 8:25 pm  

Kathryn I'm so jealous that you're close enough to be able to get to these training sessions. They've got nothing out this way (apart from our own little running group).

Just remembered that I haven't signed up for the actual run yet. Better do that soon.

Congratulations on having the guts to get out there and give it a go....we really are a nice friendly group, us runners!!

By Blogger Jaykay, at 9:15 pm  



The Girl with the Most Cake...

I dunno what got into me yesterday. I mean, the pizza was bad enough but then I just seemed to not stop eating after that. I consumed everything in sight. Even Andrew was astounded and he is used to himself!

I don't know what triggered that binge. I have been very tired and when I'm tired I overeat. I don't think there is anything else going on in my brain though. Maybe just money worries and job worries and the usual shite. Maybe I'm panicking because I'm getting closer to goal. My mind is a strange thing.

You know what is bugging me - I seem to be hovering around the same size for the last few months. I've lost kgs but my measurements aren't moving. God damn it. I need to lose some cms. Why don't my measurements change? It's not faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaair.

Anyway, today was much better. I got up and went to the gym. I didn't want to but I'd borrowed dvds last time I went and had to return them. Great motivator, huh... I had a good workout and then looked around the shops and walked home.

i can't even imagine what kind of mind games your body and brain plays on you when you are that close to goal - i have never been there. But if you can imagine feeling like I do right now, huge and lazy and bloated and disgusting, you would find the motivation that is alluding you at the moment. If you want to borrow an extra 50 kilos, I am quite willing to part with it : )

I think that you have done amazing things. I can't imagine why the measurements aren't changing unless you are getting smaller where you aren't measuring like maybe your chin is smaller, or your neck or maybe your feet ( see diet girls entry about her shrinking feet!)

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 7:00 pm  

You are getting closer to your goal and you have some such a long way and you have done a wonderful job. Well done for not dwelling on the overeating and getting motivated and going to the gym and walking. Don't worry about the measurements, just think about how much better and healthier you feel. Have a great week!

By Blogger Slim Suzy, at 2:16 pm  

I reckon it's the tiredness for sure, as well as the other stuff. You just can't think straight and your body is asking for a hit of something, anything! I've had to deal with the tiredness thing lately and with stress added, not fun. It doesn't last though, remember that!

You are so amazingly dedicated to the gym atm, well done!

By Blogger Mary, at 3:40 pm  

You write the most fabulous things. I have been wondering about the cms too. I am now 76.5kgs (snap!) and my measurements have changed very little in the last 3 months. I was hoping at least to not fill in my bra as much LOL.

These last few posts of yours have really got me thinking - especially about smug mirror watching gym bunnies falling over equipment - and I think that by the time you reach maintance the competition will be on with yourself to not let the number get higher. It won't be about the number dropping any more but god damn it if the scales dare to go one kg higher!!

You do sound stressed about work, finances, being so close to goal, and I know that these things encourage me to turn to food rather than exercise. You have done / are doing so bloody fantastically well. These last couple of days are not going to undo all that work.

Long comment. Needs to stop. Now :D

By Blogger M, at 10:31 pm  



What the hell am I doing?

I went to the market this morning and just went out of control. It started with some chocolates and lollies and then I got a slice of pizza - a huge quarter of a pizza slice. They cut it in 2 so I was going to give one to Andrew but he hates Mexican pizza so I ended up eating it all. Then I gorged on the Turkish bread that was supposed to do me for lunch next week and ham and grapes and nectarines.

Instead of going for a run, I came home and slept instead. I might go for a run now and minimise the damage.

Damn it was good pizza though.

sounds a bit like my day.....
but hey you enjoyed it & tomorrow is a new day! hope u are having a great weekend!

By Blogger Kt, at 7:33 pm  

What are LAN games??? Sorry I'm a bit dumb. :S

Lol at the gym stories... hehe. Don't ya love posers.

I hope next week goes smoothly for you
Take care

By Blogger Ang, at 8:28 pm  

Well at least your binge tasted good LOL. These days I just can't explain because I've had a few of them myself. I guess some days we just need to go *rah*. Can't be bloody good all the time hey ;-)

By Blogger Mary, at 9:52 am  

At least you ate something yummy and enjoyed it, not just stuffed your gob with mediocre junk! You'll more than make up for it, I'm sure. Hope you're having a great weekend!

By Blogger Philippa, at 1:03 pm  

That pizza is good! I had it once at the market with a friend...the slices are huge...still you ENJOYED it :)

Did you see Springsteen when he was out a few years back??

I could have killed that woman with the hair...but she was either drunk....or very stoned..or just odd!

Ah, that is what you meant by Indie...COOL!

Have a great week and make sure you get enough sleep!

By Blogger Lucinda, at 11:14 pm  


Mornings Suck

I know I've been sounding a little blah lately. One of the problems is that I've been waking up at 5 am every morning and end up laying in bed, trying to get back to sleep until my alarm goes off at 7. It drives me nuts and if it keeps happening next week, I'm going to bite the bullet and get up and go for a run. Surviving on 6 hours sleep a night is not good for me. It's not good for the tighter than tight budget either cos it means that I have to go splurge a whole $3 on coffee when I get to work. When the budget is this tight, those 3 bucks really hurt.

The good news is that I'm working again next week - woohoo! I think I mentioned in my last post, it's a teensy bit closer (cuts out 2-3 train stops), not that much in train time but it makes my walk home shorter. I tried to get the distances the other night - I used to get the road part and I know the section of the Merri Trail I walk is 3 km but couldn't get the distance for the Yarra Trail section because whereis only thinks people walk on roads!

In the end, I got a piece of string and held it up to my computer screen and wound it around the Yarra then used the thingo (is it called a legend? you know that says like 1 cm = 1 km) to work it out. Oh and when I say a piece of string, I actually mean the velvet ribbon off a choker because I own nothing practical like string. The walk is over 12 km! It takes me about 2 1/2 hours so that makes me feel much more confident about the Race For The Kids run at 14.7 km. This walk has some big hills and it is much slower walking when you have to deal with roads and traffic and interesting shops.


I know it's not good to compare yourself with other people at the gym or to mock anyone's efforts to get in shape, but the other night at the gym a guy was bench pressing on the Smith's Machine and I thought he looked like he really wasn't doing much - maybe not more than 10 kgs. After he finished, I went over to check it out - hey, I had to use it anyway - and he had on 2 2.5 kg weights. That's 5 kgs. Maybe he had a reason, maybe he was recovering from an injury or something, but seriously, my Nan could bench press more than that. And she's 93. And extremely frail.

Another funny gym story - when I stretching last night, a guy walked past the mirrors. He's checking out his muscles, thinking "boy do I look buff" and gives a little flex of the arm then trips over a medicine ball.


I'm off to the market this morning. I've missed the last few weeks cos Andrew has been having big weekends and isn't home on Saturday mornings. I can't go alone, I'd have to carry my own stuff. And well, I'd miss him. My mum asked me what he's been up to on his Friday nights out and I told her he is taking drugs and picking up hookers. She said I shouldn't say that but I think that is far less embarassing than admitting he's out playing LAN games. How did I raise such a geek?

I know what you mean about surviving on bugger-all sleep! I have a five-month old baby, who is a great sleeper - but by the time I get him to sleep and wash bottles and make his food for the next day, it is usually around 9pm before I get to exercise. So I don't usually get to sleep until around midnight then get up at 6am and do it all again!! I've just started my own blog, so if you're interested, please check it out at

By Blogger cdb, at 9:28 am  

It is interesting what you say about the average weight, so i guess average weight for your height would be in the low 70's. You are nearly about to enter low 70's, and cos you are getting fit at the gym with muscle tone, you probably already look low 70's. I am 72kg at the moment, having got down from about 94kg. I really noticed that once i got to about 74kg (which tied in with me having a bit of a shop around), that their are indeed a lot of terrific clothes items at recycled shops now that fit and look nice. i got some tshirts in blue and purple, after only wearing black for years. And got a nice girls fitting long wool coat for a bargain, after only wearing boys long coat last few winters. Also got some stretch jeans, skirts and even 2 slimming belts. Long time since i had worn a belt so i had none in the cupboard. I am on a tight budget like you are,so i thought i would encourage you with getting into the low 70's cos the best part for me was being able to pick up some bargain clothes that look really nice. i still want to get back to my old weight from years ago of 64 kg. But i read that over the last few years mostly everyone is at least 8 kg heavier on average. Possibly this is where i feel averagely comfortable at the 72kg but still cannot fit into my old clothes. So thats where it was a great surprise to realize there are a lot of bargains to be found now i am a more average size.

By Anonymous barbara, at 1:33 pm  

You always seem to have the funny stuff happen to you! You wouldn't believe it but my brther took off with his camera and I have no photos of us! So Upset

By Blogger Jadey 0:-), at 2:59 pm  

I so understand about the lack of sleep thing. For the past few months I have been getting about 6 hours interrupted sleep .. I have problems getting to sleep, once I do I keep on waking up and then I wake up fully about 5.30. Everyone is starting to tell me how tired I am looking and half the people are asking me if I 'am actually eating anything'! Ok I look tired but I don't look stupid enough to starve myself.
LOL at gym stories and about your Andrew and his Friday nights! I am sure you didn't really raise a geek!


By Blogger Thinner Nancy, at 6:46 pm  

Bite the bullet, run :-) I love exercising in the morning and you might even find that it helps you go to bed earlier in the evening so you get a better sleep. I understand about the $3. I am in budget zone too.

LOL at the gym experience. I would have been thinking the same thing and I reckon it's okay. It's only if we act on those thoughts and start teasing and making the person feel like shit, then that's when it's wrong. I'm a sucker for slap stick comedy so that guy tripping would have bowled me over. I fall over a lot myself and you gotta laugh.

LAN huh, at least you never went out with one! I think I have had my quota in Star Trek as well! Why do LAN players all have to be Sci Fi geeks too? I'm sure your son is a cool geek though, with a mum like you and all :-)

By Blogger Mary, at 9:51 am  

Still laughing so hard about that muscle-flexing guy tripping over the medicine ball!! That would have been so funny to see!!

By Blogger Philippa, at 1:02 pm  



Weigh In - 76.5 kgs

I guess that's a respectable loss but I'm feeling a bit blah about it today. I think it's hard at the moment cos in the past I've always focused on the next 5 kgs but now I can't help but look at the whole picture. I'm 6.5 kgs away from my goal. I guess, in the old measurements, that's just one piddly stone. Still I'll be glad to get under 75 kgs - it will make it seem more real.

Now, must get in the shower or I'll be late for work. I've worked 4 days this week and they want me back next week too. The travel time (nearly an hour each way) is getting me down but I think when I have money - next week is my first paycheck in ages that isn't entirely earmarked for bills - I'll feel much better. Time to buy me a treat.

Just look at that number!! 76.5kg is excellent! Congrat's on another loss :o)

1 hr travel is crappy :-(

By Blogger lms, at 8:41 am  

I would be ecstatic to be 76.5, but i'm hoping to be there soon. 1 hour travel is crappy, but I guess it's all relative to how much you're getting paid and how much you need the money. Have a great weekend,

By Blogger Briony, at 9:52 am  

Well done on the loss babe and hey, use the travel time to write! :-)

By Blogger Mary, at 6:32 pm  

great loss, 76.5kg thats amazing and so close to goal. you will be there before you know it

By Blogger Fiona, at 9:14 pm  

Only 1.5kgs until the last 5kgs! Maybe you could think of it like that.

One hour travel time is ugh! Mary suggestion of using it as writing time is good...or are you squashed like a sardine in a connex tin?

Great loss this week!

By Blogger Lucinda, at 9:16 pm  

That's a pound a half- you are mental not to be happy with that woman!

I used to love my half hour walk time to work as I could spend an hour a day getting ma shit together in my head.

By Blogger Lainey, at 2:53 am  




I'm having a rest day today. My weary body needs a break.

Tonight I was browsing through a magazine (forget which one) and it had the averages for Australian women. Average size is 16. Average height is 164 cm and average weight is 69 kgs. That means I'm less than 10 kilograms over the average weight but since I'm 4 cm taller, I'm not really that overweight. The average hip measurement is around 97 cm and the average bra size is 14c.

Buggers me how the average size is also the biggest most manufacturers make. It's almost impossible to find a fashion bra over a 14c (if they even go that high) and even rarer to find a fashion label over a 16. I know it's been said a zillion times but why? It's just not good business sense.

It also struck me with a wallop, after reading this incredibly insightful post (found via the delightful Shauna), that soon I'll be having to maintain my weight. Forever. That scares me. The thrill of seeing the number decline on the scales each week is a hella powerful motivator for me. Is it just me or do other people get to the point where you are no longer motivated by the reason for which you originally started losing weight and instead the weight loss itself is the motivator? Does that make sense? I mean, you just want to lose weight for the sake of losing weight - it's no longer about health or looks, it's about a smaller number.

I guess I have other things to motivate me now - running goals. Since I can run 5K, I want to do it faster and with incline and outdoors. Running on the treadmill with no incline is kinda like having the training wheels on, not that I want to downplay my achievement in any way.

Maintenance sounds hard. I think I'll miss losing weight. It's the only thing that's kept me together at times in the past year.

I got a new work skirt at the op shop yesterday and damn my legs look good in it. I wore it today and I couldn't stop perving on myself. I spent the day looking for reflective surfaces so I could check them out. I fear I'm getting awfully vain.

Anyway, I'll finish up tonight with a funny story. I only have one pair of work shoes and they have very thin soles and hurt my poor little baby feet if I have to walk too far - like from the train station to work - so tonight on the way home I went into a shop and got some inner soles for them. Waiting for the train, I was so amused at my nanna-like joy at having inner soles that I had to put them in straight away. I had one in my shoe when the train came so did up my shoe and got on board. As the train pulled out of the station, I looked down at the packet and realised the other inner sole had fallen out on the platform. If, but some weirdarsed coincidence, someone reading this found a single inner sole at Camberwell station tonight, my left foot would really appreciate it if you could send it to me.


insert cheesy joke about lost soles here! mwahhaha!

that really is food for thought re the maintenance. i sometimes wonder what i will do when i get there because i have spend SO long focused on smaller numbers. probably time to start getting some new hobbies ready to distract me... hehehe!

hope ya enjoyed that well-earned rest!

By Anonymous dg, at 2:42 am  

enjpy your rest day!

good post. I don't talk much about maintenance on my blog because I'm not really comfortable with the idea yet, for many of the reasons you mentioned. First, I'm kind of in disbelief that I made it, and second, I'm like, wtf do I do now? There's half a foot of snow outside so my outdoorsy hobbies aren't as available and the treadmill can only keep one's attention for so long. So I'm still working on it. Thanks for the insight!

And I thought the same thing as dg - lost soles! There's a good "missed encounter" personal ad in there somwhere. "Single white male looking for "sole"mate. If you are missing yours, I can return it to you over dinner...."

By Blogger Zara, at 4:03 am  

I think successful maintenance depends on your emotional health. After the "you look great" comments stop because everyone is used to seeing you skinny, the drama is gone. I got so focused on not gaining weight that my entire life revolved around food and exercise. I stopped going out to eat for fear that I'd be too tempted to order something unhealthy. I forced myself to exercise no matter how tired or sick I was.

By Blogger WifeMomChocoholic, at 7:04 am  

I'm scared about maintenance too, but i'm still thinking i'll never get there so i'm putting it out of my mind right now!!

By Blogger Briony, at 9:51 am  

Fashion...mmm, I have asked a designer that question about size and the honest answer was that their clothes don't look good on "fat" people. They have an "image" they want to protray with their label. I know it sucks but I can see their point of view, not necessarily agree with it but fine. I have a vision for my art too and wouldn't want it shown in certain say galleries or something. Just trying to make some sense of it.

Speaking of business sense....Anton's in Melbourne opened up in Sydney and I asked them why they're in a bad place that has no walk by traffic etc and the chick said that Anton likes his stuff to be found. People that really want their eccentric 40's inspired clothing will find it and they don't need to be on a main street or something. It's not about making loads of money but more about the integrity of the clothing, design, culture.

Now I'm waffling but I think with fashion, if it's designer, it's like art. If it's not and you can get a range of sizes, then we go to Target, Kmart or Sussans I guess.

Maintenance....much easier than you think! By the time you get to goal, you'd have worked it out and realise that you have in fact changed your lifestyle :-)

By Blogger Mary, at 6:30 pm  

It is good to think of things to work towards otherwise you could hit goal and go WTF now? Improving the 5km run time sounds great, you could also enter duathalon or something similar, work on toning etc. The options are endless.

You could take up shoe making perhaps?

By Blogger Lucinda, at 9:12 pm  



Even More Buggered

Damn, I did NOT want to go to the gym tonight. I felt tired and cranky and over it all. The funny thing, I'm starting to find is that those are the nights I work out best. Once I get into the gym, I'm fine. More than fine. I'm dandy too. Maybe it's because I channel all that crotchetiness into my workout.

So tonight I got on the treadmill and ran 5K. Hell, bugger modesty:

I ran 5K!!!!

That's one thing I can cross off my list for this year. I am so happy but so incredibly sore. See, stupid me had a sore ankle from walking home last night. It was fine while I was on the treadmill and fine while I did my weights session afterwards but when I'd showered and was leavng the gym I could hardly walk. What's a shin splint? I think it could be that - the shin above my ankle is really painful and it hurts to bend my foot.

As I limping down Russell St to the tram, past the dodgy amusement places, I was stopped several times by young guys asking if I was right. Their concern warmed my heart until I thought about it. They weren't worried about my wellbeing but trying to sell me drugs! Now that's something that never happened to me before I lost weight. I could go to the dodgiest areas of Melbourne, I lived in Footscray for god sake, and never ever got offered drugs on the street. Oh weight loss, is there anything it can't do? It even helps you get a smack addiction.

You know what one of the biggest drawbacks of eating healthy is? When you have a big cookup to freeze for later, you don't have a ready supply of takeaway containers to use. I have about 3-4 that I've knicked off my housemates and they are all being used. I have a heap of chicken in the freezer that I want to make into something and I have to wait until I have some containers for it. Yeah, I could buy some but that costs money.

Finally, a couple of people asked for my chilli recipe but I rarely use recipes for anything - maybe the first time I cook something new but then I just improvise. So this is my basic method o' cooking:

Cook up some onion and brown some low fat mince (add some stock if you need liquid). Chuck in a tin of tomatoes, more stock, kidney beans and whatever vegies you have on hand and cook up for a while. Oh yeah, and chilli powder.

I like to serve it with sweet chili sauce and a dollop of plain yoghurt and heaps of coriander. I think I chucked a bit of cumin in with the chilli powder last night too.

And the other thing - I dunno if other people do this but whenever I cook anything with mince, I put in a heap of red lentils too - it has a similar texture to the mince and makes it more diet-friendly and cheaper. The first time I did this, Andrew went on about "not eating hippy shit" but he was so impressed that even he (and he is king o'meat) chucks in lentils now.

i do that too! i'm a tightarse! but it means more leftovers, more nutrition... and stinkier farts if you're not careful.

and go YOU with the 5k! that is hilarious about the drug dealers :)

By Anonymous dg, at 1:27 am  

Maybe you need a rest day?? ie No exercise??? hmmmm as challenging as it sounds, it is do-able.

By Blogger Ang, at 4:50 am  

Yay for 5kms! That is a wonderful achievement!
Had to laugh at the drug dealers!


By Blogger Thinner Nancy, at 8:08 am  

Woohoo for running 5km!!! You just fabulous :o)

By Blogger lms, at 8:35 am  

I never use recipes either, even the first time i'm apt to change things! LOL. Yay for running 5 ks (envisage YAY in HUGE font!!). It is pretty funny about the drug dealers though. LMAO.
I had shin splints when I used to do high impact aerobics, very painful.
Hope it gets better soon, you probably need to rest up a bit.

By Blogger Briony, at 9:33 am  

Whooo Hooooo for running 5KM's. That is fantastic. Way to go Kathryn.

Wow the things weight loss can do for you these days LMAO :D

By Blogger M, at 11:43 am  

Congrats on the 5k, next it will be 10!!! Take care of that ankle!

By Blogger Madamx81, at 11:49 am  

lol to the drug bf has long hair and gets the typical freaks coming up to him...we even had the car cased in footscray once (fun)
oh, and if ur looking for containers to store food, i grabbed a set from k-mart, not anything fancy but only cost like 7 bucks....maybe worth having a look?

By Blogger laura, at 1:22 pm  

Well done for DOING IT ANYWAY and for running 5km. What an achievement! Is your shin/ankle better now?? I hope so! I always remind myself of the feeling AFTER a work out and it usually gets me moving too.

Thanks for reminding me to do a cook up for next week!

By Blogger Mary, at 6:12 pm  

5km - go you! You are going to whip my arse running this year...or should I say you running you me walking and jogging a bit.

Congrats :)

By Blogger Lucinda, at 9:07 pm  




I walked home from work again tonight - 2.5 hours of walking. Not to mention the walking I did getting to and from trams this morning and a good half hour or so at lunchtime. I'll sleep well tonight.

When I got home, I made a huge pot of chilli. My freezer is getting well stocked now - chili, beef stir fry and lasagne. Much better than Lean Cuisine.

Arrrghhh.... brain dead... can't write.

Hey Kath, can u email me your chilli recipe pretty please :-)
taa xo

By Blogger Angel, at 11:56 pm  

You're showing some dedication. Hope you had a good sleep.

By Blogger Lainey, at 4:39 am  

Hmmhhmm chilli. Well done on your walking, you must have sore feet too!

By Blogger Briony, at 9:15 am  

I hope your brain is feeling a bit better today. 2.5 hours of walking is fantastic - just don't wear yourself out!

By Blogger Lucinda, at 10:49 am  

Oh I would love the chilli recipe too

That is heaps of walking!! Amazing

My pc is about to be switched off for up to a month while I move interstate. All the best for the next few weeks

By Blogger A Girl Running, at 10:49 am  

You're right -- homemade is 10,000 times better than frozen dinners --ick.

By Blogger WifeMomChocoholic, at 11:23 am  

thats a mighty long walk...and walking can take it out of ya (as i reveal in my latest post) take care

By Blogger laura, at 12:55 pm  

So we're all coming over to you place now and walking with you LOL. You are going great guns with the motivation!!

By Blogger Mary, at 3:08 pm  

you will be needing new shoes soon!

By Blogger Ang, at 4:01 pm  

well done on the exercise.

Seriously, i was watching TBL also and wondered - why do they have to put REALLY big chicks and guys into little bra tops or topless! Noone wants to see that! I won't even wear a singlet top and here they are with the bits between their boobs and belly buttons hanging out? No way!!!!!!!

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 8:46 pm  



The Biggest Loser

So, just finished watching the first episode and I'm mad. There is just so much wrong with this show. I always have a problem with people spilling their personal lives for the tv cameras - whether it's someone discussing their brazillian wax on Big Brother or long lost siblings being reunited on a current affairs show - and when it's an issue that I feel close to, like weight loss, it angers me even more.

I guess that might seem strange to some people since I talk about a lot of personal stuff on my blog but to me the difference is that I'm in control. I don't have some producer or editor rearranging my words to make a tear-jerking story or a soap opera of my life.

Where to even start on this - I guess the weigh in. Sure it's humiliating to get stripped off and weighed on television. Nowhere to hide there. But come on - it's not like they didn't know. You sign up for the show with the full knowledge that you become public property so why make a huge drama out of it?

And the last meal - nothing, and I mean nothing, would make me gorge myself in front of a television camera. At least there was one voice of sanity among them.

But I think the thing that really stuck in my throat was that these people say they want to lose weigh more than anything in the world, that they will do anything yet they need the help of Bob and Jillian and a whole television show to do it. They can't educate themselves? They can't motivate themselves? They can't get the help they need elsewhere? To me that just doesn't ring true.

Maybe it's easy for me to sit at home and judge them and maybe I'm wrong - after all, it took me a long time to actually get to the point where stopped talking the talk and starting walking the walk - but for me, the prime reason I've managed to lose weight is that I finally took responsibility for my own issues and did things myself. That's what I'm not seeing on The Biggest Loser. I'm seeing people crying - rescue me, save me from myself. Maybe as the show progresses they'll learn to help themselves. I hope so because I don't think we can really change until we take that responsibility for ourselves.

I'm sure plenty of people will disagree with me and plenty of you will be inspired and/or motivated by the show. Fair enough. I might keep watching it to see if I can pick up some training tips or other hints but the only part of tonight's show I enjoyed was the contestants showing their "dream" outfits. That was the only bit that felt real and not (to quote one of my favourite books - A Prayer For Owen Meany) "made for television".


PS. What's the deal with AJ. Rochester? In her book she says she lost 45 kgs and went from a size 24 to a size 12 then in the Woman's Weekly it was a 80 kg loss and then on the BL she is saying a 60+ kg loss and that she went from size 28. I can understand the change in sizes if the program is intended for airing in the US as well but that is a huge difference in the kgs lost.

I thought about going on the show for a nanosecond. But there was no way in hell I was going to have my life, and more importantly that of my family spouted all over Australia. As you put it, at least with the blog it is WE who have the control.

They obviously watched TBL show when it was on before...of course they were going to get weighed, it's a weight loss show for crying out loud! (Can you see the steam).

Tracy - the reason of sanity with the meal, is one of the reasons i will keep watching, along with checking out Jillians abs and the oh so cute Bob.

And the AJ thing...well I don't know how to put it except to say - arm weights NOW! Plus the way how much she has lost or not lost disturbes me quite a bit. But she put in the hard yards, so I can't be too harsh.

All right, I should shut up now - or I'll get in trouble :)

By Blogger Lucinda, at 9:04 pm  

You echoed so many of the comments that DH said as he was watching the show. The weigh in did it for him too. I have to put my hand up and admit that whilst I know they knew it was coming it still didn't stop me from having a tear at the thought of their pain and humiliation and realisation that they were as big as they were. Even if it was for the camera's. (though - as a sidenote - I cry at hallmark & Johnson baby ads too) LOL

The gorge thing was disgusting and I think they were told to do that so they could truly feel that shamed and disgusting feeling as further fuel for their motivation. Like they needed it!!!

I am going to watch. I know I will love it. And tonights show has done one thing already - it has cemented in me a resolve NEVER to put my weight back on and feel like I have to rely on a show like this to teach me how to get it all off.

Thanks Kathryn. It's always refreshing to get differing viewpoints and opinions on such a topical subject.

Am so with you on the Ajay thing though. DH commented there was no way she was a size 12 and whilst I applaud her successes I can't help but think they have overstated / understated to suit.

By Blogger M, at 10:23 pm  

Sorry for the really long comment :D Have a great week

By Blogger M, at 10:23 pm  

You have got me interested - think I may have to watch one show just to see what it is all about. All I know about it is what M told me on the weekend (how sad is that!!. It certainly sounds like there are a few contraversial (sp?) issues happening.
Thanks for the post and getting my interest sparked.
Have a great week !

By Blogger Me, at 11:45 pm  

I'm with you on this - not just about this show (I've only every seen the shorts), but about all so-called reality TV. I just can't bear it.

By Blogger Sue, at 4:13 am  

Lot's of excellent points. I taped it, so will watch it tonight.

I didn't think AJ looked that great, and definatley didn't look a size 12. I'm guessing it's because they say TV adds weight.

It's refreshing to read someone's opinion about TBL and it not be full of how much they love it and how much they love AJ :o)

By Blogger lms, at 8:43 am  

I read an article before it aired and the lady that had the bikini as her 'wish' outfit didn't even choose that. She wanted to wear a dress or something else but they told her she had to have the bikini. You have to wonder how much of it is genuine. Having said that, I will watch it though.

By Blogger Mish, at 9:40 am  

I agree with you completely, and I didn't watch last night's show, but that's because I was out walking 5km to the supermarket and back (yay me). I will be watching tonight though, and like M, I do get teary and probably will feel for them, but then it's TV and I will remember that even though they say it's "reality" TV, it's still staged. Thanks for your thoughts, it's great to read your thoughts on this whole parlaver (??sp). LOL.

By Blogger Briony, at 10:35 am  

It's weird because I actually warmed to the show since the American Version aired last year, but I agree with a lot of what you said.

I don't like how alot of the people see it as their magic pill and I hope (like they did on the US version) learn the tools and mindset to motivate and want to do it themselves.

I'm drawn to it because it is about weight and I see it much like I do before//after pictures. More like a visual reminder that I can lose weight. I take it in the entertainment sense.

About the whole AJ thing, I didn't think she looked like a size 12 but I think it's because of what I visual a 12 to be, and because when I'm hovering around those sizes what I want to be. Plus like everyone said TV is suppose to put on weight. Don't know about that whole 45,80, 60+ weight loss though, kinda like Kristy Alley and her saying she only weighed 201 pounds at her highest.

BTW what was with the Weigh in and some of the men having to wear DTs?!

By Blogger Dee, at 1:54 pm  

p.s. I don't know how well my eye sight is @ the whole wondering about AJ's size beacuse I had to type in word verifiation THREE times before it was right LOL

By Blogger Dee, at 1:55 pm  

I personally really enjoy TBL because I get a lot out of it (eg. exercise tips) and chill out time in the evening but I agree with your review of the show also. You make valid points about reality TV and as I work in media too, I am only too aware but I like the show. I think it's well done. I also like perving on Bob and Jillian :-)

Mmm, I was a bit like WTF with AJ also. She did not look like a Size 12 and I've now heard heaps of conflicting reports about her before/after weight. I think it is very misleading and a little dissapointing.

Anyway..enough about TV and the *stars*. I hope YOU have a great week babe.

By Blogger Mary, at 5:01 pm  

Yip I'm with you! I could never ever ever eat have a crazy "last meal" Like that!! No WAY!

By Blogger Ang, at 5:14 pm  

Right there with you on AJ Rochester. Those arms aren't the arms of a size 12. ;) And I don't quite fully believe her story either.

I agree with you on the crying over the weight thing as well. Don't the contestants have to give their weight and other vital stats when they apply to go on the show? Therefore the state of their health is already well known to them and the people who produce the program? I admit I would be pretty upset if I saw a figure like that on the scales but I agree with you, the contestants totally knew what they were signing themselves up for.

By Blogger another sarah ..., at 8:35 pm  

i had a friend actually apply to go on the show, however got pregnant and called them to inform them, and they told her that was ok, she was too tall for her weight anyway...

so they've hand picked their bunch of people.... and not really sure about them all...

lol the guy that thought he weighted 130... cause that' s as far as the sclaes went up to at home.... but agree... man they knew it was coming... it's a weightloss show!!

By Anonymous ali, at 8:49 pm  

Yup, Im lovin' Tracey. That girl has class.

I really like the show. For all it's editing (I'm not a fool for editing - blah) there are some tid bits and Ah-Ha moments.

I agree with alot of what you have to say about the show. Cheesy is a word that springs to mind.

Jillian actually said something noteworthy tonight. She is giving them the tool to change themselves. She can't change them.

AJ looks great, but if she is a size 12, I'll, I'll.....

By Blogger Beckie, at 11:31 pm  

You do hear on some people's blog that they have the big eat up prior to starting the diet tomorrow. After a carb up our weight can show up as up to 5 kg extra.(water weight and xs food in body) So then it makes the next weigh in look great, after low carbs. So yep its just a tv thing to help make the loss look more for week1. That is stupid i agree.
However i do think some people could do a lot better on the weight loss show, becuase if its like the US version they pay for the person's wages while they are on the show. so the working mother who has 3 kids and 2 jobs, can just afford to concentrate like in a paid health retreat,and have free personal training, early nights with sleep, gym, no work sitting at pc all day, instead time to exercise and eat well. Also embarrassmetn and confronting the habits, might help people to switch their habits. But yep i would prefer less hype and more insight into the personal trainign etc on the show. But quite possibly we are in the minority, and the main audience wants to see the emotional dramas more than the process. Though i have to say i have had the odd cry in public in the past, i can be a real cry baby at times, but they say it is healthy to let emotions out rather than hold them in. Must be good for some people to stop pretending to be the always jovial life of the party or earth mama who loves to only look after others, and to actually say, i feel vulnerable and sad to carry the extra weight. So it might be hyped, but still the real emotions do come out in those situations.

By Anonymous barbara, at 3:25 am  

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 10:00 pm  


By Blogger kathrynoh, at 11:45 pm  

Um, sorry but have any of you thought about what you say? "Pick up some arm weights?"
Oh my god. Listen to yourselves please. That woman has lost a hige amount of weight. check out her before shots. She was huge. So what if her amrs flop - at least she is real.
Any wonder women are starving themsleves. We should all really take a look at ourselves. Who are we to judge? How nperfect do yu all look? huh?

By Blogger mandy, at 10:31 pm  


Time To Get Serious!

Last night I decided I have to stop faffing around with this stuff. I've got 7.2 kgs to lose to get to goal and once that's gone I can slacken off a bit. Well not too much but the occasional treats can wait until then. The glasses of wine and snack sized chocolates and banana bread at Borders cafe will still be there when I'm at goal. They aren't going anywhere.

I've gotten soft, folks. The rot has set in. Since the beginning of the year really my eating hasn't been good. The only thing that has kept me losing is that I've been doing a shitload of exercise. That's not good enough. The bad habits are creeping back and I have to nip them in the bud cos the minute I cut back on the exercise, I'll put on weight.

My friend's wedding is in 6 weeks. That's 5 weeks until my friend's come home. I can lose at least 5 kilograms in that time. If I want to look my best, I've got to give it my best. So, this is the deal:
  • Exercise every day (barring sickness) including 3 heavy cardio sessions a week and light cardio the other days. Weights 6 days a week (ie. 2 sessions of legs, 2 of upper body and 2 of abs). One session of yoga, pilates, body balance or some other stuff like that.
  • Increase incidental exercise.
  • No treats. Well one treat a week. Other than that it's just fruit or yoghurt or other healthy snacks.
  • Portion control.
  • Tracking every day.
  • Lots of water. Lots and lots. If I don't wake up busting for the loo then I'm not drinking enough.
  • No booze (except for the hen's night)

I'm not going to say that I'll get down to 70 kgs in the next 6 weeks. That's a 7.2 kg loss and I think that's unreasonable, but I'm going to get as close to it as I can.

Awesome pump up post! I need to do this too, I've been slacking so much and losing the same 500g for the last 2wks.

I'm with ya on giving my best starting right now.

now if only we could speed up time to 6wks..

By Blogger Dee, at 8:56 am  

sounds like a plan! I'm glad I read your blog 1st up this morning.. you are sooo going to do this!

By Blogger linda, at 9:05 am  

Perfect timing - exercise is the only thing that's been saving my arse (literally) as well. Thanks!

By Blogger Sue, at 9:11 am  

What a great post Kath - I feel like you're really psyched to get moving again. You say such sensible things too - the icecreams, the grog, the treats that I have all too often will still be there when I'm at goal! What a wise girl you are.

I hope it all goes well, give it your all and I know you'll succeed. You'll outshine the bride if you're not careful heh heh!!

Have a great week :)

By Blogger Philippa, at 9:23 am  

Go Girl! You make me want to run outside now...except I'm off to the dr, so i'll wait to bob about afterwards.

It's true you know, i forget...all those things will be there when i get to goal...I just must not make up for not having them when I get there.

The plan look great:) Have a great week!

By Blogger Lucinda, at 9:43 am  

i've felt this way too...although u seem to be getting some results....i dont think i have had any....yep so this is the time to get serious....and kathryn u have it in u...i'm totaly behind and i'm sure everyone else is too...go go go!

By Blogger laura, at 11:08 am  

YAY You can do this IDiet!
A lot of us need a kick up the ass at the moment!


By Blogger Mucky, at 12:58 pm  

You sound totally ready and realistic about this, so go ahead and do it! You are right all that stuff will be there once you reach goal, if not something else equally as good will be in it's place.
Here's to a great week!

By Blogger missjesse, at 2:45 pm  

Thanks for your comments Kathryn - wowsers? It's not that great ;) No they are the same glasses I had on when we met at SIS - it's just the makeup, hair and no sweat make me look alot different, if I have my hair straight I look like another person - one of my best friends walked past me the other day because she didn't recognise me with the straight hair.

Indie look? What is that...I'm a bit slow with the times.

I SO want a spudatoe! but I had a bagel for lunch :(

Biggest Loser tonight - YAY!

By Blogger Lucinda, at 3:46 pm  

yeah! great idea. faraway, so close, i know the feeling!

and i know you can do it, coz you rule the school.

By Anonymous dg, at 11:37 pm  

I've got two weddings in May and June and I've been thinking similar thoughts. Like, I've just noticed that all formal dresses have no sleeves! What?! So, I now have 3 months to try and make my upper arms less flabby. Or crochet a jacket :)

By Blogger PastaQueen, at 2:20 am  

You can do it!

I'm on a similar mission and it's great to read posts by people who are ready to crack down. I'll be checking back frequently to see how you're doing!

By Blogger Jessi, at 5:59 am  

With that attitude you are going to do really well, GO FOR IT! I know you can do it :-)

By Blogger Mary, at 5:03 pm  




Thanks for all your lovely comments on my last entry. It's been a great year.

I woke up yesterday feeling off colour. I'd been out with my friend, Sugar Lips, on Friday night and drank a little alcohol - not a lot, just a couple of glasses of wine - so I thought I had a woosy-girlie hangover but it got worse as the day went on. For some reason, whenever I get a migraine, I have this huge denial and think if I put off dealing with it, it will go away. But migraines never do - they are persistent little buggers. I should have seen this one coming. Whenever I have about 3-4 days without enough sleep in a row - bingo! Migraine.

So I slept a lot yesterday. Then I got up and realised I needed food and that maybe a walk would do me good. I ended up going to Piedmontes - a little supermarket in North Fitzroy. But the whole time I had that disjointed feeling. I guess it's hard to describe to someone who doesn't get migraines but, for me anyway, when I have to do stuff like that it's kind of like I can make myself go through the motions but I'm really not there. Shopping is very hard because even the simplest of decisions becomes impossible.

I managed to get some fruit and other things I needed then I noticed their bakery section. They have lots of little cakes and biscuits and things and I felt like a treat. I think I hovered around for ages. To make the decision even harder they have the nutritional info for everything beside it so I wanted to get something nice but not too calorific. I ended up getting this little almond ball thing. Very yummy.

So I came home and spent the rest of the day in bed. I'd planned to go to see Walk the Line but figured there was no way I could sit through it. Maybe I'll go tonight.

I'm still feeling whoozy and blah. Also feeling bad cos this has meant no exercise (apart from the short walk yesterday) all weekend. Maybe I'll attempt something this afternoon but I don't think I'll be pushing myself too hard.

Hope you are feeling better soon babe and don't worry about the exercise. A day off here and there isn't going to mess you around too much. Be good to yourself.

By Blogger Mary, at 9:51 am  

Migraines suck! Luckily I hardly ever get them. Hope you're feeling better.

By Blogger Sue, at 10:20 am  

take care and don't worry about 1 day without exercise. Migarines are a killer and not much you can do except rest. I understand all to well what you mean about that spaced out feeling.

By Blogger michelle, at 12:08 pm  

Hey there, I hope you are feeling much better. I have never had a migrane, touch wood, but it sure doesn't seem all that nice.

Take care

By Blogger Ang, at 12:59 pm  

hey hope u are feeling heaps better soon! just reading yesterdays post - congrats on your anniversry & all you have acheived!

By Blogger Kt, at 5:17 pm  

Poor you. I used to suffer badly from migraines so I know what you are talking about. Touch wood I seem to have grown out of them or whatever was the trigger has gone from my life. I hope you are feeling better soon. Happy Anniversary and congratulations on your fantastic achievements. There's some major stuff in those milestones, you should be very proud.

By Blogger Lesley, at 10:44 pm  

Hope u are feeling better. I dont suffer from migraines but can imagine that all u would want to do is keep your eyes closed and sleep.

By Blogger linda, at 11:14 pm  

I hope that you are feeling better soon - take care and look after yourself - Michelle is right - not much else to do except rest.

By Blogger Me, at 11:17 pm  

Hope you are feeling better now. Well done on your great choice at the bakery section. Very restrained :D

By Blogger M, at 11:25 pm  

You said the 4-letter "M" word!!! They're funny things, so different for everyone; mine put me in bed for 2 days and with hangover-like symptoms for a further 2, a friend gets them every TOTM but can still function and another vomits then feels fine. The only thing that even goes part of the way to knocking me out is Mersyndol. Hope yours disappears soon.

By Blogger CaramelKitKat, at 11:48 pm  

Hope you are much better. Migraines are so horrible.

By Blogger Slim Suzy, at 7:24 am  

Don't worry about the lack of exercise .. concetrate on getting yourself better! I have never had a migraine so can't even begin to imagine how horrible it must be ...


By Blogger Thinner Nancy, at 8:19 am  



A Kinda, Sorta Anniversary

I thought today was my anniversary - one year of weight loss - but looking back over my archives, I'm not sure. I had some mix ups between my old scales and the new ones near the start and weird shennanigans like that, but since 10 Feb 2005 was the date on which I recorded my starting stuff in my Slimmers Magazine diary, I'm taking it from that date.

So in the past 12 months I've lost:

  • 32.9 kilograms
  • 7 cm from my upper arms
  • 40 cm from my waist
  • 30cm from my hips
  • 22 cm from my boobs

I've also gone from no exercise to working out everyday. I can run. I can make it through a whole Spin class. I can walk forever and think nothing of a 5 km stroll into the city. I'm the one saying - it's not far, let's walk it - rather than - is it any further?

I can shop in regular size stores for the first time in my life. My main clothes problem now is that everything is too big. I can buy what I want because I like it not because that's all that fits or it's the only thing that covers the bulges. I don't have to buy stretch fabrics or elastic waists cos that's the only thing that fits even in the biggest size.

My blood sugar levels and cholestrol is back to normal. I no longer get irritating side effects from diabetes ie. the regular reoccuring thrust I used to get (sorry if that's tmi, but it's worth losing the weight for that along, trust me). I don't have that constant feeling of weariness.

I know that I can do this. Recently I read back over my archives and it's amazing to have a record of this past year. Just to know that I've binged and made mistakes and slackened off or had setbacks in the past but bounced back each time is so reassuring. I can trust that even if I have bad days in the future, they don't signify the start of the end. A bad day is just a bad day, nothing more. The other days can and will be good ones. I can keep this going no matter what other shit life throws at me because in the end I know this is what I want.

Plus in the past year I've found all the support and kindness online - you guys rock ... but you know that already.

So, what's ahead? I think I need to focus on finding balance. I enroled in my writing course today and that is going to take up two nights a week. Hopefully soon I'll be working more constantly too. That means working exercise around those things and getting super organised. I'm good at going gungho on things - full on exercise or full on writing or whatever - and ignoring everything else but that isn't the ideal way. I need to have a bit of everything going on. Balance is the key.

holy crap what amazing statistics... it is incredible how far you have come, and it's been great reading all about these changes. good on ya!

(btw, how quick did that year go!?!)

By Anonymous dietgirl, at 9:30 pm  

Bloody hell Kathryn! You have done some job! I'm impressed and inspired by you.

Love reading about your ups and downs (and am delighted that most of them are ups in attitooode and downs in weight lost).

Rock on!

By Blogger Lainey, at 11:05 pm  

wow...u have come so far, and u did, and I see yet again another loss (go u) if u can achieve so much in a year...just image what u can do with this one thats here...have a good weekend

By Blogger laura, at 12:32 am  

Who cares about the exact date with *those* accomplishments!


*clap* *clap* *clap* *clap* *clap* *clap* *clap* *clap* *clap* *clap*

By Blogger Zara, at 4:29 am  

Happy anniversary! Well done on everything you've achieved.

(bizarre - the word verification I have to type to post this is my initials followed by the word run. Is blogger trying to tell me something?!)

By Blogger YP, at 7:11 am  

I actually read over your archives a few weeks ago. I wanted to see if you, a successful loser, had problems early on like I am having. The exact same thing struck me, you just kept bouncing back. I had a giggle when you were excited about losing 5kg - I wonder what that you would have said at the time had they known you were going to be 30+kg lighter by this time??

By Blogger CaramelKitKat, at 7:54 am  

One word.


Ok so that was three. Her is another 2.... happy anniversary!

By Blogger Beckie, at 10:35 am  

Reading this post made me smile for you and for all of us that really are inspired by you.

You have done amazing things not only with weight loss, but with your health and your life and you should take a bow!


By Blogger snackiepoo, at 11:50 am  

You are amazing. You have come so far physically and mentally. I am so totally inspired by you. Thank you for letting us share your journey. Happy Anniversary!

By Blogger Briony, at 4:03 pm  

Kathryn what an amazing year you've had.


By Blogger Jaykay, at 5:29 pm  

What an absolutely fantastic year you've had - health, weight, fitness, the lot. You should be very proud of yourself. And I'm sure balance will come.

By Blogger Sue, at 6:27 pm  

My god!!!! It is always soooooo impressive to see the things written down like this!!!!

You know, all this year I been reading, every post I read, it still amazes me. The turn you took and the dedication and amazing results are indeed trully spectacular!!!

I really bow in front of your achievement Kathryn!

By Blogger Silverella, at 7:11 pm  

what fantastic stats. well done Kathryn - you work so hard so u deserve it.

By Blogger linda, at 7:40 pm  

Hello, I am from calorieking, Can you please contact me epineh to let me know how you are going with the valentine swap Thanks heaps

By Blogger Natalie, at 12:02 am  

A time to comment on the inspiration that you are to me. Many blogs inspire and drive me, yours is one of the top 3! You really know how to write in a way that holds the attention. I think that you have come so far in a year that you should be patting yourself on the back.

Not only have you lost weight but you have confronted plenty of issues that you have had in your inner turmoil.

You have set up Ab Flab which is an under-utilised tool for great reviews.

You have achieved the ultimate in my book, which is being able to buy clothes at any place you want. For someone like me, with 43.6kg ahead of me till I reach that pinnacle - you keep me grounded and knowing that it is achievable.

For all of these things - I THANK YOU.

By Blogger Jules, at 7:26 am  

I have nearly been doing this for a year too (started 22 Feb last year) and this weekend I have been thinking about the changes in me since last year! Your entry just summed up my thoughts exactly!
You are doing wonderfully and will continue to do so!

Happy Anniversary!


By Blogger Thinner Nancy, at 8:13 am  

What an awesome achievement Kathryn and isn't it so funny to see yourself as someone who exercises now? I think it's fantastic!! Balance is definitely the key and I look forward to following you on your journey this year also. You have a great unique perspective on things and I appreciate the issues you choose to discuss in your blog. You're a gem!

By Blogger Mary, at 9:49 am  

Happy Anniversary to you dear Kathryn!

You have done really well - I hope you are feeling a bit better today though.

By Blogger Lucinda, at 9:14 pm  

WOW what an amazing effort for the year. Congratulations on the goals you have achieved, the successes so far, and for the knowledge gained along the way. Knowledge that you have readily imparted which has helped in countless ways.

Happy Anniversay. May this year be as successful as the last.

M xx

By Blogger M, at 11:23 pm  


Weigh In - 77.2

Not much of a loss but at least it is a loss. Next week will be better.

couldn't have said it better ;D

hope you have a wonderful weekend Hun

By Blogger Dee, at 1:04 pm  

Good luck this week Kathryn. You have helped clear up a problem with me too. I also work in actic temperatures. 35 degrees outside, 2 shirts and a cardigan inside. Now I know why I have been having the cravings. Thanks.

Hope things go better this week for you :D

By Blogger M, at 2:08 pm  

its a loss woohoo. mini goal of 70 will come and go in no time
well done

By Blogger Fiona, at 2:56 pm  

A loss is still a loss no matter how small ... just takes you a small step closer to your goal


By Blogger Thinner Nancy, at 3:36 pm  

A loss is a loss and that's good in my books, congratulations!.

Have a great weekend

By Blogger Jaykay, at 5:20 pm  

Every time someone says "a loss is a loss" I think of the Mr Ed theme song! hehe - hope that made you laugh. Have a great weekend.

By Blogger Briony, at 7:50 pm  

Great loss - well done!!

By Blogger Philippa, at 12:55 pm  

You're still getting closer to you goal babe, good going :-)

By Blogger Mary, at 9:42 am  




I wasn't going to go to the gym tonight but figured since I didn't go yesterday, I'd better not skip or I'd start developing bad habits. So I intended doing a light workout, got on the treadmill and warmed up then ran for 11 minutes...had a 4 minute walk break then ran for 25 minutes. Then I did lots of pushups and other arm stuff. Woohoo.

Sometimes you just need to get started.

I'd had to stay back late at work so by the time I left the gym I was the last one there. It was kinda nice, like having my own personal gym, until I was getting changed after my shower. Just think of any horror movie set in a high school (or the entire first season of Buffy). Every time you see someone alone in a locker room you know they are going to end up finding or being a corpse. Luckily, I'm too big to stuff in one of those tiny lockers.

Then I headed to the supermarket to get something for dinner. That old dieting advice about not shopping when you are hungry is bunk. I was starving and all I wanted was protein and salad. I was far too hungry to care about chocolate.

I worked out today why I've been such a piggy lately. You know, it's easy to get wrapped up in the psychology of weight loss and try to analyse all the deep issues that lead you to eat but sometimes the answer is far more simple. See the office I've been temping in is freezing. The air con is set to arctic temperatures. Seriously, today I was so cold, I took my backpack to the bathroom and put on my running tights and singlet under my work clothes. At least I was warm.

Being so cold (plus overtired from this week's running around) means I've been craving carbs like no one's business. I'm back there next week and I'm going to make sure I have a big, thick jumper in my bag even on the hottest days. Plus I'm going to pack my food. When hyperthermia is about to set in and you are in a canteen with the choice of fruit stored in a fridge or a piping hot muffin from the oven, it's damn hard to pick fruit!

Arrggh, without going into too much detail about my financial doings, I found out today the bank is screwing me over and I need to give them $$$. Banks are evil buttmunchers. I'm meeting my sister for breakfast tomorrow and think I'll need to hit her up for loan to tide me over until work picks up. I hate doing that kind of thing so much. Just got to keep remembering she's had no qualms about asking me for loans in the past.

What does it say about me that the first thing I thought was "yeah, but you'd fit in five tiny lockers"...too many slasher movies me thinks.

LOL at your use of the term "buttmuncher"! Have not heard it in yonks but am going to incorporate it into my everyday vocabulary - love it!

Hope the work picks up, toes crossed.

By Blogger CaramelKitKat, at 12:10 am  

Think how many calories the shivering must be burning!

By Blogger Sue, at 3:04 am  

I was thinking the same as Sue. The office in Taiwan where Al is working is absolutely freezing and I had to send over some warm slippers (they can't wear shoes inside) for him. The weather there is freezing at the moment - hard to comprehend when we are talking given how we are sweltering here.
I think my imagination would have been playing the same games had I beed there by myself except I haven't seen any horror / Buffy shows !!!! But I can still imagine !!!
Hope you have a great week and manage to get a loan from your sister.
Take care and have a great weekend.

By Blogger Me, at 2:28 pm  

Try HSBC fees!!

I'm always cold at work. I even had the heater on today!

But hubby complains even on the hottest days when I get into bed and my feet are freezing cold!

By Blogger Jaykay, at 5:23 pm  

oooh I know what you mean about the cold, and its effect. I keep thinking how much harder this weight loss is going to be when its freezing and raining. (Much like it is at the moment.)

By Blogger Ang, at 7:04 pm  




I was going to go to the gym tonight but I felt so blah so I came home and slept instead. Now I feel like I'm getting the flu ----- arrrrrgghhh! I don't need this. I can't afford not to work.

I had another interview today - I don't think I had the skills they were looking for though. It shits me. Surely employers have some kind of moral obligation not to drag you in for an interview when you aren't going to get the job. It's not like I have hidden skills I don't list on my resume, you know just as a hidden surprise. Interviews are time consuming and mean that I'm not working so not getting paid for that time. It bugs me when I don't even have a chance of getting the job.

Somehow, with all my piggery, I don't think I'll have a loss this week. I guess that's the way the cookie crumbles. Mmmm... cookie.

I just came on to blog so I could stop thinking about food. D'oh!! LOL. Usually with interviews, if you have all of the "Essential criteria" they can't not interview you, it's a legal requirement. Hope you find something soon.
Have a great night, I really hope you're not getting sick.

By Blogger Briony, at 9:29 pm  

Mmm, cookie. Good luck with the interviews babe. I am at this stage too now and agree they are time consuming. I hate canvassing for clients sometimes but it's good when you get a contract. Be good to yourself and I hope you don't get sick!

By Blogger Mary, at 6:21 am  

oh no...not the dreaded flu...i think i'm almost at 7weeks with mine qand it wont go advise see a dr early...who knows how interviews work these day...but good luck with it all

By Blogger laura, at 10:42 am  

Hope you are feeling better soon - it is lousy to get sick when you are getting into your exercise and wanting to do things.
Hang in there and look after yourself !

By Blogger Me, at 2:09 pm  

Are you okay mate? Sound a little down and flat. You are a great person with a great outlook on life and you will find just that extra special something soon and that is why things are taking there time. Hold on in there.

By Blogger Jules, at 2:37 pm  




I walked home from work today - I'm not sure how far it was. On the map it is around 10 km if I walked the direct way, but I got to Richmond then walked along the Yarra trail then the Merri Creek trail. Longer but far more scenic.

It's the first time I've been on a long walk in ages - I've been so much more focused on running lately. I like walking, it's not just exercise but mediative as well.

Great to see you mix it around, with your exercise, sounds like you are on a real groove with that.

By Anonymous Barbara, at 1:18 am  

I walked last night too - definitely better for the soul (and the dog) than running.

By Blogger Sue, at 6:39 am  

Good for you. That is quite a walk.

By Blogger michelle, at 7:43 am  

What a great long walk - you are right, walking is very meditative. **Note to self - get out walking more often than I have been **
Have a great week !

By Blogger Me, at 9:17 am  

I know what you mean about walking being meditative. I find I love listening to the birds, the sun shining on my face, the fresh air, the flowers & trees whistling in the makes me realise how beautiful the world is. It is very reflective and inspiring!! always makes me smile going for a good walk on a gorgeous day!! I am grateful to have the experience!!

Also wanted to say a BIG THANK YOU for your lovely supportive comments on my journal :-) sorry I don;t comment much on yours. i dont really comment much on anyones even though I read like 50 zillion blogs a week LOL...maybe thats why, but I want to take the time to start commenting toshare the support with others who are always inspiring me.

By Blogger Angel, at 10:50 am  

Yeah I agress with you on the walking!
Sounds like a fair hike, but thats the beauty of walking, if your in the mood you can go for miles! Or Kms in your case!

By Blogger Ang, at 4:09 pm  

That's a huge walk. And it would have been such a nice walk with that view too. I feel peaceful just thinking about it :D

By Blogger M, at 8:54 pm  

Sounds perfect! The meditative part is why I like walking so much myself. I can really thrash around ideas. Reminds me to buy a dictaphone or take pen/paper with me.

By Blogger Mary, at 6:19 am  




I am buggered tonight - went to the gym after work and got stuck into the running then Body Balance. Body Balance is a great class for stretching and winding down but it doesn't finish until 8.15 so by the time I showered and got changed then caught the tram home, it was late.

Run in the door, grabbed some stuff and threw together a stir fry (making enough for 4 meals) and, while that was cooking, stewed up some plums that are getting a bit old to have on my brekkie. I didn't have any spices to put in them so used some of my chai masala mix (yum, it's good, I'm having some with icecream right now).

So it's 10.30 and I've just got to sit down at the computer... and it's almost time to go to bed so I can get up and do it all again. I've got a feeling this whole week is going to be like this.

Michelle (and anyone else who is interested) - they said it was around $3000 - 5000 for a tummy tuck after medicare and private health insurance rebates. I know you can get some tax rebates if you have medical costs over $1,500 as well - not sure if they had taken that off as well. You also have to maintain your goal weight for quite a while before they will do it. It can mean up to 2 months off work to recover. The people I spoke to work for a female cosmetic surgeon which I think would be more reassuring than going to a man. Middle aged, male doctors are the pits!

If I'm going to spend serious money on my appearance though, my teeth are top priority. After all, people see them!

Oh yeah, I've been a Piggy McPig this weekend (well starting from the middle of last week really). I don't know what my problem is at the moment. I feel a lot less piggy after the gym tonight though and i got my butt into gear and got fruit for work tomorrow so I'm not hanging out for lunch then running to the caf for a muffin like today.

goddamn... i better start saving the big bucks :)

and stewed plums! phwoar... sounds yum. and summery!

By Anonymous dg, at 2:54 am  

Don't cha just love it when you are busy busy but all organised.

Your gym workout sounds like a right corker. Any progress pics planned to show us your fit bod?

By Blogger Lainey, at 4:30 am  

thanks..lot of money isn't it? And no way I could have 2 months off work. But I have had other operations and gone back to work way quicker than told. Just don't lift things etc. Good luck with better eating this week. You are going great with your gym work.

By Blogger michelle, at 8:37 am  

LOL at Piggy McPig, me too! Must be something in the air. I don't need a tummy tuck but could do with a boob reduction, costs about the same I think. Yikes. Have a great week!

By Blogger Briony, at 11:08 am  

wow you had a bit of a work out there and a late night, i was a piggy all last week

By Blogger Fiona, at 12:16 pm  

That's actually a lot less than I thought it would be. If I only had one surgery choice it would have to be that, or to get the girls lifted. LOL.

Sounds like a real busy time for you at the moment. Have you had a chance to write at all at the moment? I must get back to your other site to finish reading too. Hope you have a great night :D

By Blogger M, at 3:21 pm  

Hey at least you ran to the caf... haha... extra cal burning ;)


By Blogger Ang, at 5:23 pm  

stewed plums...mmmm!!! You could add a few drops of cognac essense you know and they would turn yummier!

And what is this site that M goes and read your writting?

I want to read too!!!

By Blogger Silverella, at 5:52 pm  

Mmm, the plums w/ chair spices sound delish! I'm into the idea of getting my teeth fixed soon too but I've got to start saving. I hope your week is going well!?

By Blogger Mary, at 8:52 pm  

Maybe not so much time off is needed for sitting at pc jobs. Working in restaurants or cafes or shops can mean carrying things, and a lot of bending or getting laybys off top shelves etc. then again maybe sickness benefits or somethign might be possible. whatever, it is heartening to know these tucks are coming down in price and getting more professional all the time. the yearly food bill could be cheaper at 75kg. Iguess a lot of us are spending what we save in food on the gym or on some health diet treats or extra vegies. But we probably will save a lot of money on having less health problems over the next few years. So the tummy tuck starts to look not so expensive after all. I guess they are also getting really great at doing them by now also.

By Anonymous barbara, at 1:14 am  



Makeover Expo

The Makeover Expo was brilliant. So glad I went. I met up with Jadey and her mum (sorry Jadey, I've forgotten your mum's name) who are both heaps of fun.

First off we went to a seminar on how to dress with style. The woman had some interesting stuff to say, including using Jadey to demonstrate how to draw attention to your boobs! Well maybe it wasn't quite like that.

Then we went around all the exhibitors. It didn't look like a lot but there was heaps to keep us interested and lots of freebies. My favourite giveaway bag was from the dentists - it had a tube of toothpaste, a dental floss business card and a disposable camera!

I found out heaps about dentistry - eg. it's expensive and about tummy tucks - not as expensive as I thought. I also had my nails buffed so they are nice and shiny instead of covered in half-chipped polish like they usually are. We entered about a thousand competitions so the junk email will be coming in heavy for the next few weeks!

We had lunch (and a much needed coffee) then watched the pole dancing demonstration. Later, I had a chat to the pole dancing girls about the hen's night I'm organising. In an amazing synchronisitic moment, just after I left the hen-to-be sent me a text asking if I thought pole dancing would be fun for the hen's night. Freaky.

Got some photos before we left - us with our loot. I still haven't finished my camera but I'll post them eventually.

I love free stuff, even if it is just junk mail!
Glad you had a good time, can't wait to see the photos.
Have a great week.

By Blogger Briony, at 8:54 pm  

Looks like you had a fantastic day...I'll have to go to it next year. Can't wait to see the photos :)

and great news about the wish jeans!!

By Blogger Lucinda, at 11:05 pm  

Sounds like you had a great day! Oh and I love freebies too! Have a terrific week!

By Blogger Tina, at 7:11 am  

Sounds like a great day. I love freebies too! Pole dancing must be meant to be for the hen's night!

By Blogger Slim Suzy, at 7:28 am  

Expos generally wouldn't be my thing, but this one sounded like fun. Keen to see pics, I bet you're smaller than in the last one!!

By Blogger CaramelKitKat, at 8:33 am  

Sounds like a fantastic day! Love free stuff!

By Blogger Philippa, at 8:50 am  

WOW hope they have that expo here. I will be there like a shot. What a fun afternoon. I especially like the opportunity to have an 'expert' help explain how to dress to highlight certain features. Wonder if I could do that for my elbows ;D

By Blogger M, at 12:55 pm  

i so wanted to go to that, but bloody work got in the way...nut so glad that u had a good time, cant wait to see the pics

By Blogger laura, at 1:16 pm  

Glad to hear you had such a good day - will keep an eye out to see if it may come to our side of the world.
Cheers and have a great week !

By Blogger Me, at 2:26 pm  

What a fun day! Really looking forward to seeing the photos too :-)

By Blogger Mary, at 3:07 pm  

sounds like fun,I'm hanging out for the photos
regarding the dentist, i did hear that some people who have the dental insurance just get one crown or something done each year, and so then it is not so expensive. other friends of mine have had to put things on the credit card and resign themselves to paying off slowly. i think we all need to have a few major teeth repairs by a certain point. nobody really told me to expect that so it does come as a bit of a surprise, but i hope the repairs keep the teeth going for a few decades.

By Anonymous barbara, at 4:22 pm  

I need to know more about the tummy tucks...were they very expensive? never know one might come in handy one day. Glad you had a good day. I have never heard of a makeover expo.

By Blogger michelle, at 4:28 pm  

You know neither Mum or I got that camera either - You are the only one!! Lucky girl!
I had fun it was great - Mum is Lorraine

By Blogger Jadey 0:-), at 4:46 pm  



Wish Jeans

Even though I've been losing weight, my measurements have been staying the same. How annoying is that?

So, a while back, I bought my wish jeans - a pair of size 12 jeans that I want to fit into - and I've periodally been trying them on and measuring the centimetres needed to fit into them. Last time I tried, it was 23 cm. Today it was 10 cm. How does that happen when my waist and hip measurements have stayed basically the same?

The only thing I can think of is that my belly fat is getting more jiggly and easily compressed. Kinda like if you have 12 oranges in a bag made out of some firmish, shape holding fabric then you took out some oranges, the size of the bag stays the same. Until you take out all the oranges and the bag kinda collapses on itself and goes all saggy --- arrrrgghhh! Don't want to think about that.

So yeah, with only 10 cms needed to get the wish jeans done up, I did the old lay on the bed trick. I got them zipped and buttoned! Sure I had the muffin top to end all muffin tops, but I go them on.


I'm not one for fancy cooking, but I thought I'd post my new favourite dinner recipe.

Kathryn's "I've just run my butt off at the gym and now I'm too stuffed to cook dinner" salad

Half a bag of prepared salad mix from Coles (get the cheap Farmland one)
Half a small tin of 4 bean mix
A tomato chopped up all rustic, Jamie Oliver style
Some chicken slices - get the Farmland chicken breast supreme, it's as good as Weight Watchers and cheaper
One of those little cheeses from the pick and mix cheese thing at Coles

Chuck it all in a bowl and add balsamic vinegar.

Easy, peasy lemon squeezy and it's got all your vegies, carbs and protein. I think I'll be eating that for dinner often.

How good did it feel to get them done up??! I hope you danced around the room!

Loose skin certainly doesn't appeal, but it has to be better than having it full of fat. Whooo-hoooo!

By Blogger CaramelKitKat, at 12:20 pm  

I’m with ya on the muffin top ~ I’m rocking my own! But even though you did the little metaphor thing I still think it'd be amazing to have only 10cms left!! Like Caramel said how great did it feel to get them done up? AND size 12 to boot. nice.

Congrats on 77.6kg that's bloody awesome Hun!! I hope you're strutting around everywhere.

That dinner sounds super yummy I've copied it am going to try next Monday (when shopping is due) thanks for sharing ;D

By Blogger Dee, at 1:39 pm  

I use those salad bags too as a base .. I buy the one from Woolies, has different lettuces, cubed cheese and cherry tomatoes already in it. I then add 1/4 avocado, an egg and a small can of tuna or for a change 1/4 breast of cooked chicken. I then put the "free" ceasar dressing on it, so easy and .. YUMMO!

Congrats on your continued losses .. have been reading your blog for a long while and loving it .. first time I have left a message.

By Anonymous Karen, at 4:12 pm  

Hey Kathryn, congratulations on being able to do the wish jeans up. i agree on the measurement thing, it is hard to tell sometimes when you pull the tape tighter or looser, but you can tell with clothes. fitting into a nice pair of jeans is a great incentive for me also. i love wearing jeans lately, after 4 years of leggings with a skirt on top. i found some cute opshop jackets and loosish tshirts to help hide the "muffin top". Plus i cut the band on the sides of one pair of jeans to allow a little extra space at the waistline, and wore a tshirt over the top. i went out to see i mean listen to Henry Rollins the other night, and it felt so easy to just put on a pair of jeans, tshirt and boots and feel comfortable and relaxed.

thanks for the salad idea, great for summer. Another quick meal idea that i use wnen i am very hungry but very busy, is to cook a frozen microwave meal, but put a big bundle of spinach leaves, mung bean sprouts and tomatoes into the bowl ready to add the meal on top. Or i cook up onions, capsic, mushroom, celery and zuchini slices ie tons of "free" vegies for 5 minutes in frypan with a bit of water and the lid on top to help steam thru. i add these cruchy vegies to the cooked meal. Sometimes i add tamari, or sprinkled chilli powder or other herbs and spices while the vegies steam. But the frozen meals usually have a sauce in them. i kinda fee that some cooked rice and things in the frozen meal is ok nutritionally, provided i have added a bunch of fresh vegies.

By Anonymous Barbara, at 6:56 pm  

I can definitely relate to your wish jean story and now that I am at goal, I still can't fit into mine properly! I decided it doesn't matter now LOL but yay for getting into yours!

Yum, I like the salad too. I did something similar last week but with one of those flavoured capsicum/tomato tunas instead of chicken. Yeah, I'm not a fan of WW products either. Firstly, they are more expensive but they don't taste so great either. I'm a foodie, always will be so it's gotta have something going for it. Enjoy the rest of your weekend!

By Blogger Mary, at 7:35 pm  

well done on the jeans woohoo and the loss thats such a great effort.
have a good weekend

By Blogger Fiona, at 9:17 pm  

weights a funny game huh...i swear i've been pretty on it with the sit ups and yeh, i think my stomach is bigger than its ever been...go figure, i love the quick salad isea, gone off it a bit but may have one well :)

By Blogger laura, at 1:50 am  

good on you for getting those jeans done up. I have the same problem with the wobbly tummy. Measurements don't shift much but I fit into smaller clothes......... It i squite achalleneg to do the 14.7 fun run isn't it but good to have something to aim for.

By Blogger michelle, at 7:33 am  

Not long now and those jeans will be fitting like a glove.

Good to see you on the running forum. Nice to see a familiar name.

By Blogger Jaykay, at 8:07 am  

omg, it must have felt fantastic to get 12s done up!!!!!
that salad sounds great!!!

By Blogger Kt, at 5:11 pm  


As for the jeans, I bought the first size 18's in a long long while before Xmas. The fitted great at the shop etc but that night when I jammed on the "hold it all in" undies and put on my jeans, the looked great. But the roll that was pushed up above them and stuck out further than my 18E breasts (I know - disgusting) was so foul that I had to wear a big baggy hippy top.

Just you wait until the muffins have gone and you will lose it with delight!!

By Blogger Jules, at 7:00 pm  

Whooo hooo for the pants being closer. I do think that the stomach gets a bit more squishy and easier to manipulate in clothing. Well, that's happening with me anyway.

Love the salad. Very similar to what I have planned for lunch. Which I am going to get right now.

Hope you have a great day :D

By Blogger M, at 12:54 pm  



Weigh In - 77.6 kg

Weigh in today. I was disappointed then I realised it was a 0.8 loss. That's not so shabby. My eating hasn't been so good this week - a chocolate chip cookie here, a wagon wheel there. I need to make sure I have enough fruit to last week so these other things don't creep in.

Not too shabby at all!! Congrat's :o) You are well in the 70's now.

By Blogger lms, at 8:49 am  

Not in the least bit shabby, yay you!

It seems like only yesterday that you were in the 80s, but now you're entrenched in the 70s. Your chipping away each week shows me that I shouldn't be disappointed by smaller results (or go off the rails after them) as they turn into significant ones.

By Blogger CaramelKitKat, at 9:02 am  

Well done on another loss. No way that's shabby!!

By Blogger Briony, at 10:40 am  

It is still a loss and not shabby at that especially if your eating has been a wee bit sketchy...good for you!

By Blogger snackiepoo, at 11:56 am  

Fantastic, .8 is not shabby at all, any loss is good, anything over 500g is something to be dancing about 'dance, NOW!'

I'm not doing the time trial this weekend because of sad financial status GRR. I'll get a friend to stop watch me in a few weeks, I really wanted my boxer shorts!

By Blogger Lucinda, at 3:57 pm  

Whoo hoo - what a loss!! Go you!!

By Blogger Philippa, at 4:57 pm  

Fantastic loss babe, well done!

By Blogger Mary, at 9:31 pm  

800 grams is great - I've finally got into the habit of taking a week's worth of fruit to work on a Monday - sure helps stop the snacking!

By Blogger Sue, at 4:18 am  

A wagon wheel? Okay, I'm going to assume this is some sort of treat I've never heard of, because I hear wood is really hard on the digestive system :)

By Blogger PastaQueen, at 5:35 am  

Gee you are getting so close to your goal. Way to go on the determination front.

By Blogger Jules, at 9:47 am  

Congrats on the loss Kathryn. That is fantastic. Hearting all those muscles is obviously paying off LOL

By Blogger M, at 12:48 pm  




Omg, you should see my bicep. It's huge. I keep flexing my arm to check it out. All my pushups are paying off. I heart muscles, especially when they are mine.

I went to the gym tonight - did 40 mins on the treadmill (plus warm up and cool down) and ran for 35 mins of those 40. Only thing is I need to remember to leave some energy in reserve for walking home from the train station! I was stuffed. I think I felt it more cos normally I grab a sushi roll after the gym but tonight I had to rush because I had 5 minutes before my train ticket expired.

I also walked this morning. My car is dodg-a-rama because the left driver's wheel bearing is stuffed (do I sound like I know stuff or what) so I decided to catch the train but, because I'm working in the suburbs, I worked out the most time efficient plan. This won't make any sense if you don't live in Melbourne but I walked to Clifton Hill station to get the express train then got off at Jolimont, walked around the MCG to Richmond station and caught the outbound train there. Saved myself much stuffing around with the city loop and got some exercise in the process.

My temp contract finished today after 2 days. I have a problem with temp work, I feel. I'm too good. Seriously. It bugs me that I'll do the job in half the time they are expecting yet I get paid the same rate as a temp who drags the work out the full time. I could slack off but I hate that. I'd rather work fast and not get bored.

I'm a bit over it all anyway. I have a few job possiblities at the moment but they are all airy-fairy. I want things worked out. I want a routine. I want to know what I'm doing from one day to the next so I can slot in all the other things - school and gym and stuff - around it. I also want the income. This poverty thing is getting boring. Hopefully I'll have it all sorted in the next week or so and I can whinge about how much I hate my job instead ... hahaha.

i heart biceps also but when i 'flex'in front of hubbie, he thinks its his god given right to grab the chicken wing underneath thus destroying my illusions that I am the Termanitor II chickie. (one day right?).
I dont heart when someone says, "Oh - this is xxxxx, she's the temp!".. The job i'm in currently started off as a 3 month temp assignement and I've been here for 3 years and a previous 1 day temp job ended up being 9 1/2 years so who knows - the yukko temp job may end up putting your foot in the right door. Enjoy the rest of the week.

By Blogger linda, at 10:51 pm  

The transport made perfect sense - clever you - I hate the loop, never seemed to work for me.

It must be lovely (and just desserts, sp?) to see your muscles shining through. Would make sense if it keeps happening as you lose the weight hiding them - whooo hoooo!!!!

By Blogger CaramelKitKat, at 12:48 am  

Those biceps must be allowing you to finish your work even faster!

Okay, maybe not. But that's gotta be the best feeling to see your biceps bulging out. Can't wait until mine do the same! Do I have to work my muscles or something for it to happen? ;)

By Blogger Zara, at 4:28 am  

We'll have to start calling you 'Muscles of Melbourne'

By Blogger Sue, at 7:10 am  

RAn for 35 mins. I am in awe!!!!!!!! Good luck with the next job.

By Blogger michelle, at 2:18 pm  

*drool* I am really liking chick muscles LOL. Good luck with working out a solution to your job situation atm. Are you looking for part time or full time? I'll see if there's anything going at my work in the Melbourne Office. They employ writer/reader/transcriber types to do just that. Read, analyse etc. I'll email you when I look at the job list on Monday.

By Blogger Mary, at 9:30 pm  



Resolutions Revisited

Since it's the first of Feb, I thought it might be worth checking back on my NY resolutions.


Well I'm getting closer to my goal weight. I'm not sure of the total lost for Jan but it's definitely slowed down. I've been doing more weights and working on that stuff too.

Running 5 km - well I ran 3 km, that's more than halfway! When my friend Simon comes home for a flying visit in March, we are going to go for a run together. I am going to beat him!

Diabetes stuff - oops. I've been awful slack on this.

Get a massage once a month - damn, I didn't. I tried to book in for one the other day at the gym but I didn't know what was happening work wise. Maybe I'll just have to do two this month.

Appearance and Self Image:

Well I went to the shrink yesterday and we had a good session. She is going to work out a plan for me and we doing an initial 6 weeks. She was lovely and I think I'll enjoy working with her. And I did have the best tee shirt at the Big Day Out - that's a definite boost!

I still need to organise health insurance so I can get dental work done.


I found out today I got into my Writing and Editing course. Woohoo! I was pretty confident I would, but didn't want to count any chickens. Now I can go to Smiggle and buy nice new stationary (or is it stationery - always get that one confused).

My plans have kind of changed for this year - I still want to finish my novel plus I have ideas for two new projects that are really exciting. Much to do.

I also need a job to pay the bills. There is one opportunity in the air that is perfect but I don't want to say too much.


Ha ha ha! I'm scraping by, I guess that's something.

Living Environment:

Still crap.

Friends/Social Life:

I haven't done any of the classes I said I'd do and I'm not sure. With all my other plans plus work and gym, I dunno if I'll have the time.


I went on one date. That's a start.

I'd give myself about a B for January. Some things take more time than others and I think I need to work on getting the balance right in my life.

Arrgghh and I missed out on the zoo fun run tonight. Damn Melbourne weather - it's supposed to be summer not raining.

I had to google Smiggle and am glad that I did ... mmmm stationary porn mmmm

By Blogger Sharon, at 8:39 pm  

What a great idea to re-visit your NY resolutions - most people make them and forget about them.
It should be "ery" - the way I remember it is that Envelopes are part of stationEry !!
Have a good one !

By Blogger Me, at 8:59 pm  

And I always remember that cArs are stationAry LOL. The things we are taught at school.

Congrats on getting into your course and well done on scoring a B on your scorecard. That's pretty good only one month in. :D

By Blogger M, at 10:17 pm  

Congrats on getting into the course Kathryn - Where is it?

I like how you went through the resolutions you made in Jan - food for thought...and a B is an above average result you know :)

By Blogger Lucinda, at 10:32 pm  

I remember stationary the same as M, (cars).

Well done on your B for January :o) It's a fab idea to check how you are going after a month.

By Blogger lms, at 10:49 pm  

oh please give beck a massive hug for me! i miss her : P but there is noone you want to go to a beauty expert more than with beck - she rox at that stuff! I think that you did very well and I would definitely give you a B plus! You did heaps well : } ooh! and a sticker!

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 11:52 pm  

how scary is it...feb already, seems like u sure took some good steps in this first month....and theres still 11 month of the year to go...go u

By Blogger laura, at 3:04 am  

I always remember stationEry and lEtters go together? Hope that helps you! I have major trouble with affect and effect.
I'd give you a B+ for your efforts this month, you've done really well. Fantastic that you got into your course.
Have a great day.

By Blogger Briony, at 7:29 am  

My remembering trick is that you get stationery from a stationer!

By Blogger Sue, at 9:02 am  

The interwebby: fun AND educational

By Blogger Sharon, at 1:49 pm  

Excellent way to digest eactly what you have done and what you havent.

A B is great in my eyes!

By Blogger Beckie, at 2:12 pm  

Well done with everything. You're very positive and it's great to hear about the course too. I look forward to hearing about your novel also. I seem to be surrounded by writers atm :-) I am studying a Sub Editing course this year myself, whoot!

Now go get that massage...

By Blogger Mary, at 9:27 pm  



current weight:
76.6 kg

start weight:
110.1 kg

total loss:
33.5 kg

goal weight:
70 kgs



boobs: 100 cm

waist: 81 cm

hips: 109 cm

thighs: 50 cm


Weekly Goal Lifestyle Changing Challenge-A-Rama

Week 1 - Drink more water

Week 2 - Cut out sugary treats


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